watching 'any day now' 1998 the year dad fractured his spine. i couldn't watch anything about lies hypocrisy prejudice having too much at home. too much poison to process. autism doesn't have certain filters antitoxins. now that i don't have to associate with family i can watch.
"i remember mama" 1948 i learned how loving families function, how to budget pay rent first food second, succeed in life. critical path management. i watched a lot of tv weekends after cleaning house, mowing the yard from the age of 8 'til 18 when they kicked me out for putting myself through college. Mr Rhodes my high school advisor filled out my college applications and helped me. i tutored his daughter in algebra. mom put me last because i didn't complain like my sisters she told me. mom rewarded complaining. complaining creates negative chemicals. Gerde complains expecting rewards and just gets sicker. George thinks Trump is a saint and gets sicker with wrong thinking..
i cooked the chicken thighs drumsticks. i should have separated them instead of baking 4 quarters. cooked unevenly. much harder.
chrome crashed again. i'm retrieving pages faster with less fear and anxiety. i have to update and close to keep connection. this chrome is oldest model.
decided 8 pm Lucky's freebie none 3 cherry soda for ticket forgot misplaced found back to store. course in miracles=not appearance of success or failure in attempt intention.
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