Thursday, April 25, 2013

Waiting for the other shoe to drop-Ann Xiety

My old friend, Ann Xiety.    Cleared some stuff from living room.  Okay maybe I overdid.  Fell asleep easily tho'.  Exhausted.  11pm-5:16am.  Tailbone on fire.  Stomach queasy.  So maybe I'll phone it in.  I have to confront dr ali at some pt but not today.  I still have to cash refund from ATT.  

Still so attention deficit.  Just spent half hour cruising sites to cash check.  I have to laugh or cry.  

Stomach is trying to tell me something.  Made yummy potatoes, brussel spts, shredded carrot mix last nite.  Been eating mango salsa and beans and rice.  Vegetarian heals and helps anxiety.  

Just discovered if I put cursor over on right side a page pops out.  

Maybe it was the bupropion, welbutrin.  Took one ystrday and this a m at 5:16.  A mystery.

Maybe a nico-lozenge will help.  Yes it's better.  Welbutrin is supposed to suppress the desire for nicotine.  

I want to go to Campbell library today.  That's what I want.      

I need something like nicotine to ground me for want of a better word.  

That's the planning to the Oakridge Mall.  Saver's, Vitamin World, 1.2 mi apart.  Salvation Army Sunday?

I'll find it soon.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

New Age Dawning-and it's freaking me out


Everything is going so well.  Like b4 parent trap.  Taking care of parents is a mistake.  Bigger than marrying the wrong person.

The only reason I married him was cuz he was familiar.  Like the sum total of all members of my family.

What a landmine!!!!!

So now I'm licking my wounds and healing myself.

Specifically, I haven't lost anything lately.  I have allergies and I have the time to take care of myself.  Tomas has been wonderful getting my cleanup ready for next week.  I have a feeling of doom and sadness.

I'm on the edge of new territory.  I feel I'm entering a new world.   I'm leaving the old behind.

First Comcast was jerking me around $47-$48/mo., so I switched to ATT and they outright lied about how much it cost $55.60.

The landline is the only continuity I've ever known in my life.  Everything else changed.  People came and went.  

The phone number moved with us from 1160 Lawrence Sta. Rd. to Nobili Ave.

Getting rid of the expensive landline and going to 2cellular phones is generating either new feelings of insecurity or is exposing dormant feelings.  Maybe fear of the new.

Every operator at Consumer Cellular has made me feel we're on the same team.  Fellow creatures.  And I've talked to maybe a dozen or more of them asking questions and getting help.  So I've entered the modern age?