i've processed. i decided i'm going into seniors late. bookmobile first then swim. rebellion is a good thing. i'm asserting myself. i'm standing up for myself.
i changed my mind, spirit got me to seniors at 8:30. swam, then bookmobile and upstairs to read. lunch ok. everybody left i read. hilda late with extra food 2 meat, dry refried beans, squash. lots wasted. upstairs i read. went to central picked up new star trek and adam-12 1+2. then home I rested in bed and finished reading 'spare'.
5:30 feeling jumpy. between whitney and prince harry i'm dealing with my feelings. i don't feel as stupid since they kept loving and believing liars over and over. that pain and disappointment causes suicide, self destructive behavior. so scary i keep anticipating punishment. decanting canned drinks to plastic bottles. doing to distract myself.
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