Thursday, November 21, 2019

long night

9-11-3-4-5-5:30.  SLEEPING LIKE A BABY.  WAKING UP TERRIFIED ALL NIGHT.

I'LL TRY THE PASSPORT THING.  I'M GATHERING INFO.  

I RENEWED CHROME, PAID DISCOVER.

I'M BINGE WATCHING MEDIUM 6.  THIS MORNING IT RENEWED THEN WHEN I DOUBLE CHECKED IT DIDN'T.  OH, WELL.

I'M WAITING FOR TOM TO CALL AFTER HIS DENTIST TODAY.  HIS EXCUSE FOR POSTPONING YESTERDAY.  I CAME HOME TO REST AND BE GENTLE.  HE'S SO FAMILY.  IT BRINGS BACK MEMORIES OF THE CHAOS. 

HE ALWAYS DENIED ME MY FEELINGS AND LIKE MY FAMILY IGNORED THE DISRESPECT AND ABUSE.  HE LIED TO ME THE ENTIRE TIME I'VE KNOWN HIM.  HIS FAMILY IS LIKE MINE.  HIDING SECRETS AND PRETENDING. 

AT LEAST THE TENSION AND ANXIETY I FEEL I CAN ASSIGN TO WATCHING MEDIUM.  THAT'S WHY PEOPLE LIKE SCARY SO MUCH.  IT GIVES THEM A SCAPEGOAT FOR WHAT THEY FEEL.


No comments:

Post a Comment