feels like summer.

already hot sweaty.  dream of 'rick' marcia rickman multi million dollar realtors showing their home overhead view walking large dog.  no idea where dream came from.

cooked frozen spinach cheese ravioli in toaster oven.  trying to crisp it.  cooked some in water with bragg boullion.  i like snacking with cole slaw.  

consciously resting is hard.  i keep thinking of things to do.  i can do 8 squats in a row then rest.  noon i watched 'white men can't jump' rosie-gloria wins jeopardy.  quirky movie.  

i'm bingeing adam 12.  so many i've never seen and so many guest stars i recognize.

we all do what we know or what's easiest

lucky loaded free biosteel and bought 4 sugar free flavors.  dollar tree bought 10 calm candy, glasses cord, scoped out full freezer.  

potato covered fish plenty left overs.  4 fish.  gloria asked me to bingo.  i went upstairs to puzzle for half an hour and forgot.  she came to find and remind me.  we played 'til 2.  i had calm goli candy in car trunk gave her samples to deal with parent care.  was a little melty i forgot to cover i hadn't planned on staying playing bingo.  dropped off 'spare' book at central main library.  home i rested in bed watching 'what about bob?' 'til 4.  still makes me laugh.  

i'm so much better at pacing myself.  

i was so sad and angry

i've processed.  i decided i'm going into seniors late.  bookmobile first then swim.  rebellion is a good thing.  i'm asserting myself.  i'm standing up for myself.  

i changed my mind, spirit got me to seniors at 8:30.  swam, then bookmobile and upstairs to read.  lunch ok.  everybody left i read.  hilda late with extra food 2 meat, dry refried beans, squash.  lots wasted.  upstairs i read.  went to central picked up new star trek and adam-12 1+2.   then home I rested in bed and finished reading 'spare'.  

5:30 feeling jumpy.  between whitney and prince harry i'm dealing with my feelings.  i don't feel as stupid since they kept loving and believing liars over and over.  that pain and disappointment causes suicide, self destructive behavior.  so scary i keep anticipating punishment.  decanting canned drinks to plastic bottles.  doing to distract myself.

'i wanna dance with somebody'

so hard to watch.  they treated her like crap until clive davis signed her then her parents took over her life and success.  they claim her 'gift' and decide to hold her hostage.  if they knew better they'd have been successful with their own talents.  

gloria reminded me of a free nrg drink today only.

wee bit too much

restless night.  finally watched 'all passion spent' entirely.  bringing in the bin too heavy.  next time i'll leave 'til morning to bring in.    

tried fixing glasses super glue didn't work.  taped it.  i did fix pink mesh swimsuit bag.  used ribbon to reinforce handle.  I swam an hour, upstairs i read, puzzle table used by deaf woman.  lunch tiny lasagna, garlic spinach was good.  lttle gloria, toki, alex.  upstairs i digested and man at the puzzle i read more 'spare' due 2 days.  

cupertino library-bartolo one bin

too much.  picked up movies, adam 12.  pete gave me his lunch after i gave the table cookies.  he was full of cookie i guess.  i filled all the water bottles.  trunk is full of wash and food.  maybe tomorrow.                        bartolo filled, put out one bin.  i put it in.                                                                                                           i was so hungry when i got home.  ate some leftovers and 2 pieces of pumpkin pie.  i'm satisfied with my day.   my feet are so sore something new.   

feeling

strange and new.  almost painful.  maybe everything new is perceived as pain.                        cooked 7 drumsticks oven and 3 in toaster.  puck oven so tender.  deboned meat.  cooked carrots potatoes puck oven hour 300.  4 carrots 4 pots too much needed half more.                watching 2021 musical of p g wodehouse 'anything goes' 1930's life.  i'm considering going to sunny and county tomorrow.  returns and holds.  i could go sunny today open 6.  county 2 days.                                                                                                                              HERE TODAY billy crystal movie.  trailer on 'otto'.  3:30 wore pj's to sunny relaxed no problem checked in combo picked up hot spot.  i knew they lied telling me they always waited 3 days to check in.  water filter down couldn't fill bottles.  relaxed ate potatoes and carrots chicken skins.  pumpkin pie dessert.