called eye app 1-17-2023

dr mark soonest.  $2450 yearly exam w/o insurance.  dentist tomorrow 4 pm.

i don't know.  all this new behavior setting off autism alarm bells.

walter remembered

he brought me chocolate covered marshmallow and chocolate bars.  he's so funny and sweet.  he made a special trip.  he knocked on car window as i was eating lunch listening to healing.  it's working.  we talked 'til 2 wandering the center.  then i bought meatloaf @ nob hill and 2 clearance 99 cent spray veg wash.  

sunny vale library-GLOBAL WARMING IS ALL ABOUT MANKIND CONSUMING ITSELF-WAKE UP PEOPLE!!!

i'm stressing out.  i watched fighting on the tv while dressing at gym 2.  what a waste of energy.  i'd enjoy these healthy buff young men building a house or doing anything constructive that adds value to the planet.  i find sports boring.  when we had a world where physical prowess was important like roman gladiators 2000 years ago it was sensible.  but today the shame of the handicapped is all based on an outdated obsolete notion that only the physically fit add value to society.  with technology that's crazy.

1960's we called it conspicuous consumption.  so we've known a while.  consumption is what they called tuberculosis.

my back

i woke knowing what i've been doing wrong.  i forgot Thomas Hanna studying how babies grow muscles.  they stretch and rest.  stretch and rest.  i've been beating myself up like mom did to me expecting crazy results.  i'm letting go of the self judgment.  

i soaked at gym 2.  my right foot is so sore i can barely walk.  better after i stretched.  found a wells Fargo visa card on side walk tried to get mail man to take it to bank, not on his route.  debated where to leave it started to safe way some branch inside when owner came around corner looking for it.  whew!!  more clearance croissants and tahini.

i always notice things.  half a dozen people milling around and i'm the only one who saw it.

sunny vale library discovered 'i survived...' series.  bears, no wolves.  home for lunch and 'concentration.'

even earlier

doing new yesterday gives me hope.  today driving to seniors check engine light came on i called Carlos he was busy 'til after lunch perfect.  i showered, exercised, computed added freebie, picked up lunch talked to toke.  ate in car listening to healing.  called good time for Carlos.  he reset computer maybe O2 sensor or i didn't let it warm up it was so warm this foggy morning.  could be the bad air quality.  probably bad air quality.  i gave him apple and extra milk from lunch.

so i went to college safe way iceberg lettuce $.98.  found 2 new bottles Kirkland water.  i remembered Coleman cost co gas mile and half.  filled up although long lines tough maneuvering through lot.  then i stopped seniors to reset chrome.  on to pay Citibank and pick up lucky's freebie Laird veg creamer and health warrior oatmeal, clearance $.99 baby salad mix.  said hi to Cathy.  home 2 pm.

i can't believe how much i accomplished.  

slept to 'poirot'

new behavior always riles me up.  woke feeling restless.  so i went to work early.  sat in the car and marked closed library days.  

i'm feeling a little depressed

first of the month blues.  i mailed life ins. banked chase.  and yet i have no feeling of accomplishment.  no satisfaction.  home 1 pm 'gigi' a musical of an intended courtesan marrying.  i don't understand.  i don't need to i just need to let it go.

i said hello to table and gerda misplaced her meds she just bought so i went to her car and found them.  i know that sinking feeling.  so i'm home resting with my feelings.  tomorrow big day of help.  ride to check up.  

i experienced 2 body quakes while totally relaxed watching 'Poirot', 'the labors of Hercules'.  she was the ultimate predator camouflaged.  scary.  like my sisters.  the first body quake was like the opposite of a stab, a surge of energy radiating out in a 3 dimensional wave.  almost bounced me from the bed.  the second was still startling.  nothing like it before.