I'VE HAD GREEN PROMISE 1948 MOVIE FOR YEARS AND ONLY WATCHED IT LAST NIGHT FOR THE FIRST TIME. WALTER BRENNAN PLAYS AN EGO STUBBORN FATHER LIKE DAD. LIKE DAD HE SEEMS INTENT ON DESTROYING HIMSELF AND EVERY ONE AROUND HIM. LIKE DAD HE MANIPULATES AND BULLIES. LIKE AILEEN TOO. I CAN WATCH AS A NEUTRAL OBSERVER.
HE APOLOGIZES AND CHANGES UNLIKE DAD. DAD CHOSE TO WALLOW. HE HAD US JOIN JW'S IN A HALF-HEART ED ATTEMPT TO REGAIN GOD'S APPROVAL. HE COULD HAVE LEFT US HOME. SINS OF THE FATHER. DAD AVOIDED TAKING RESPONSIBILITY. HE TRIED TO SPREAD IT AROUND. DIDN'T WORK. NEITHER DOES TRYING TO EXPIATE SOMEONE ELSE'S SINS. ONLY YOUR OWN.
THE WHOLE POINT TO 12 STEP PROGRAMS IS MAKING AMENDS. STOP SINNING IS A GREAT WAY TOO.
MY HIDING THINGS FROM MYSELF IS MY FAMILY INGRAINED SELF-SABOTAGING. WHEN I GET OVERLY STIMULATED I GO UNCONSCIOUS, REVERT TO THE FAMILY AND THINK LIKE DAD, TOO CLEVER. IT'S NEVER ANYTHING IMPORTANT THANK GOD PROTECT ME FROM MYSELF.
I LOOKED ONLINE FOR FACE MASK PATTERNS AND DIRECTIONS. NOT GOOD. VAGUE. I'LL JUST COPY THE CHEAP ONES I HAVE. I'M FINE TUNING MY LIFE. A SUCCESSFUL LIFE IS A LOT OF LITTLE THINGS.
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