I am willing to follow spirit-Paid Disc, PGE

sleep is a miracle.  scientists know nothing of how we sleep.  

I am at peace.  I love to sleep.  

I let go.  

I called S Kohlwaies has referred to legal dept.  didn't respond to my mail.  he sent to litigation dept.

Walter gave me 2 poly lace curtains.  I walked Walmart paid PGE.  

I walked Savers found shampoo $6 and $13 dress to exchange for shorts and bath suit.  so much fun walking and looking.  Grocery Out 2 goat cheese frozen combo, 

Sean 719-534-4903 litigation specialist in Co.  missed his call message to mail to me.  

Louise is my S Hero--->1,003,559,886 PCH tokens-PAID DISC-new OTC

her example gives me courage.  I went to bed early and I woke early.  I listen to her on You tube.  she's healing my heart.  

she passed 8/30/2017 the same year as Eric 6/13.  

I think it was Isaac Asimov who chose to write at 3 am when the world was the quietest.  I feel at peace.  

on Friday Walter asked about my anxiety then kept interrupting me.   we were like an Abbot Costello act Who's on First.  

Tommy Walker Meyer 1947 Oh-1994 Ca.  47 yrs old.  

Walter dug up baby lavender so they'll live.  

dreamed of drama phone call from Mit

so depressing.  my pain over everything.  I divorced X because I knew he'd die like his dad.  I couldn't stay around.  I wouldn't torture myself. 

the court and scam elder abuse is pain from my sisters embezzling mom's estate, threats of eviction, physical violence.  I didn't want them prosecuted.  I didn't want them in jail.  I had to retain Susan M Kanclier $5K.  worth every penny.  

mitzi's boys came to me for college money when the sisters had all the estate cash.  ludicrous.  I worked part time school part time took me 6 1/2 years they made fun saying I'd never graduate after X quit working.  well, I did graduate.  the only one.  never even a card or phone congratulations no acknowledgement whatsoever.   

I could be angry but too ludicrous.  a waste of time and energy.  

Karen Kuek is bringing all the pain back.  all the humiliation and abuse.  listening to Louise my wounded child is healing.  "my heart is unfurling".  my stomach is relaxing.  

I returned Alice and picked up Cup Ghosts BBC original series.  I'd seen info online.  then I remembered and checked Target elastic found at Michael's $6, Ross no windshield cover, Safeway frozen crispy chicken $7 got cash back.  all in 2 hours.  

TYGJ-999,699,886 tokens--->1,000,059,886

I'm tired of being the strong one.  the chrome crashed.  restore. 

my baby emotions are rising to the surface.  I must be safe.  otherwise it would stay safely stuffed down.

chrome 57% charge from internet connection.  I had Louise playing.  

checking accident report wae so wrong.  Kuek, Lai, O'brien.  3 against me and Burgos faulty description.  

I'm so glad I won't live forever and have to put up with the nonsense.  

WOW!  I googled me Rev and found X's obit, Hans's second wife Marjet, Albert Bernardine's second husband, Mary Martinez not Martha.  I'm reeling amazed.  

listening to Louise "if you're tired of Being Strong"  yes yes absolutely since 8 years old everything is my responsibility.  

I checked book sale none at Sunny this month.  

I don't know how Hot ready @ central-999,169,886 tokens 9:30 pm

yesterday still 26/37 and today ready?  returned Sunny on March 22.    TYGJ.  131 waiting.  

we are only limited by their minds.  997,934,886 tokens 8 am.  

I called Stephen left voice mail re Alicia sending e mail r/t fax.  I hope he's healthy he sounded froggy.

what did people do before electronics.  everyone on their devices.

Walter is afraid he can't change.  impossible to be more powerful than God.  

I have to remember my wonderful future.  

I decided on spam sushi for dinner and $5 cake for dessert.  Safeway gift card.  

Back to business-I'm feeling wordless pain

infant pain I'm healing.  hurt inflicted before I had language.  

I called Stephen Kohlwaies @ 8 am.  still no professional courtesy of a reply from brentwood law wanted fax from CSAA office.  I remembered America's Tires on the way, they filled tires.  Alicia Cortes @ SJ recommended e mail for more direct delivery.  

Safeway clearance peanut MMs, stevia $4, 4 2/$ chips.  Savers b suit 3 pr pants 50% orange, grey tag pkg new elastic rolls 1 black 1 white $6.  Grocery O fish, peas, salad.

SCORE!!

Both Glorias encouraged county SCAM & FRAUD ALERT 1-2 pm Gabriel will be at May 8th Wellness Fair.  

Happy Tax Day-PAID PHONE ONLINE-28/58 or 26/37

my feet are vibrating.  I wore shoes so cold this morning.  I left S K a detailed v mail.  I hope he's connecting w/them.  brentwood lawyers trying to intimidate me.

I need a break.   I forgot to lock clothes and left shampoo in shower and God took care, OK.

PCH is changing policy today.  now must be a paying member.  997,654,886 tokens $20 minimum to enter give away.  

1 pm PCH is back.  

I renewed chrome.  I'm feeling exhausted.  lunch w/Trudy, Kenny, Fred, Toki, Walter.  Ruben goody bag chips great help.  

fed birds, general sort trunk -29/58 Sunny-city 28/37

city glitch online I drove and walked around.  WOW!  I'm so much better than 2001.  5 pm works fine.  6 pm went to Jack Box 4 tacos.  

Karen Kuek hired Brentwood LA to sue me.  I called Stephen Kohlwaies already gone home Jason Soriano very helpful.  I left voicemail and detailed information on pages.  S Kohlwaies adjuster had requested but no action from Ryan@brentwoodlaw.  SHAKEDOWN!!  

I called Silent Unity.  

I'm remembering-31/58 & 29/37

my shake.  etc.  I don't need distractions to avoid pain.  

my denim strap dress fits perfectly.  

found my green car key YIPPEE!! 35/59 city 30/37

in a lunch bag bottom pocket waiting for seniors to open.  soaked and stretched.  sprinkling I'm driving cautiously.  

I picked up St. Just lunch and weekend bags.  at central eating lunch in copy room AARP magazine ad for oxygen tank $10/10 L at CVS.  I made 1 call 15% of phone charge.  aisle 6 & 17.

I stopped J in B 4 tacos $3.69 online.  

home 5 I reset denim straps on sweetheart dress and seersucker.  I watched TV then bed great day.  

started raining 7 am- 38/59-PAID CITI

after I got out of car waiting for the Seniors to open.  I stayed and played on puzzle 'til 3 PM close

Citibank has wi-fi.  I bought 2 fish $6 remodeled BK.  

I decided to go when ready-38/59

I've always set a time, not today.  I was ready and came.  did one water fill up for home.  

just me and Walter for lunch.  no buffers.  

my favorite dance-abundance.  I'm requesting 'Ghosts' from county.  

so far OK 41/59 city 33/37

I finished Goldilocks puzzle.  Hyperfocus.  my back & hips hurt.  ignore pain.  my ADD may be a reaction to family abuse neglect.  

chrome stayed at 99% all night finally 100.  I'm distracting myself.  

maybe I'm not ADD.  maybe a coping device to ignore emotional pain.  being ignored or misunderstood can cause emotional pain especially in autism w/o words.  

I'm loving the protein drink.  made some home and drank it here.

ST JUSTIN rummage Saturday April 18 8/1.  I asked Jane made a big deal telling me so arrogant told me she knows everything stick with her.  not worth it.  she said 15th.  

First Baptist Church Friday 24/Sat 25 9/5.  

I'm improving no update revert to draft and republish-43/59 & 36/37

extra chicken wrap a whole whole grain tortilla so much better than hot lunch.  and a protein bar at 3.  lunch with my chosen family Fred, Toki, Walter.  food eh company excellent.  deli meat stew, peas, mushy carrots cauliflower I tossed.  practically no noodles.  

I'm hanging out at seniors.  I pondered Tuesday senior Savers.  

Caleb gave me extra fold up dolly I have bungees and cording.  better quality than mine.  

I went to BK $5 Whopper Jr. tiny bourbon burger good to OK.  I added Vicky avocado.  I cooked onion from chicken wrap for b'fast eggs.  lots of chicken.  

back to the grind 49/59-36/37 Bartolo yard just as I left-day #14 no hot

polishing me shiny.  I found all my books.  WHEW!!  I looked in the front seat countless times and TA DA!!  

I dreamed I lost bags and my things.  it was just stuff.  my sisters/thieves. 

Vicky offered me preferred avocados I took 4 she gave Inge bag of 10.  HUH!  

I stayed at seniors puzzling Goldilocks 3 bears 'til 6 after wheel entry.  went to SC BK couldn't find my wallet.  went home looked, called CVS OTC cancelled getting new card.  then called Discover Diamond to freeze my account no new action since Saturday Grocery O purchase.  so definitely misplaced.

then looked in Sat grocery bag TA DA!! found wallet!  I have to stop scaring myself.  I called Discover robot easily unfroze my account 2 questions.  

I made strawberry salad w/can chicken delicious.  I still want BK.  tomorrow.

3 hours of hula -37/37-53/59-MAILED LIFE

I remembered X probably had stop over from VN.  so many loving memories of my relatives.   funny how the memories and feeling of love came back watching and listening to Hawaiian Rainbow & Kumu Hula.  and X hated the thought of Hawaii.  must have had a bad experience stop over from Viet Nam.  

I soaked and stretched at seniors.  finished Seascape puzzle.  no St Justine I stopped Safeway 2 corn dogs, $2.49 pastry pork Pie, $1.98+CRV 4 butterscotch cream soda so good.  all on gift card.  

my life was such hell and Heavenly now.  

so much enthusiasm-57/59 city 41/37-PAID BARTOLO all dressed up just getting home

I couldn't find Costco bill.  using receipts $75 by next Fri.  seniors early for bird food and 2 lavender volunteers.  center closed tomorrow Sunny open.

I called and talked to Debbie, 14 already on wait list.  Bridget gave me homemade raita for lunch.   I am blessed.  

no Cody today Earth day at Triton.  maybe Savers.  I'm enjoying snacks at central.  Paula gave me half an apple pie and baklava.  Cindy had more GS rocky road cookies.  I'm enjoying treating my inner child.  

AND I HAVE TOMORROW FREE.  

Tommy Walker Meyer and Sophia both autistic.  never eye contact.  they appreciated I didn't care.  

April fools-61/59=43/37

 Sunny plant sale 4/12 Sunday 10-2.  

lovely mellow day overcast humid.  I'm resting puzzling snacking.  Ruben gave me 2 sourdough St Justin sandwiches chips in goody bag.  I prefer sourdough.

Gloria asked about Sunny lunch on Friday city closed.  I just checked open salmon.  not feeling it.