I ACTUALLY FEEL LONELY

A NEW EXPERIENCE.  I MUST BE BETTER.  WHEN I WAS SICK I WAS TOO SICK TO DO OR BE ANYTHING ELSE.  TO FEEL LONELY IS A STEP UP. 

YESTERDAY I SPENT A GREAT PART OF THE DAY LOUNGING IN BED BECAUSE I CHOSE TO NOT BECAUSE I WAS SICK.  I STRETCHED AND PAMPERED MYSELF.  GOT UP AND WATCHED VENOM DVD.  CARTOON, COMIC BOOK MOVIES AMAZE ME THAT PEOPLE WOULD SPEND SO MUCH MONEY MAKING SUCH VIOLENCE.  OUR NEANDERTHAL DNA RELIVING THE PAST. 

A LOVELY RAINY DAY TO DO IT.  I FEEL GUILTY ABOUT THE JUNGLE YARD.  I DON'T KNOW HOW THE YARD WENT ON THE 8 YEARS MY BACK FORCED MY INACTIVITY. 

I TRIED TO IMAGINE THE YARD'S SEASONAL PROGRESSION AND I CAN'T.  I WATCHED THE 2002 TIME MACHINE WITH THE CG PROJECTIONS AND STILL CAN'T IMAGINE.  ANOTHER FEAR BASED, VIOLENT EXPRESSION OF OUR NEANDERTHAL DNA.

WATCHING TEA WITH THE DAMES DVD, A REAL LIFE DISCUSSION OF LIFE AND DEATH. 

I WANT BETTER NEW EXPERIENCES.  THE ONLY WORTHWHILE MEMORIES ARE THOSE OF KINDNESS.