i drove to citibank considered lucky's, nah. a different route to seniors. showered exercised changed put clothes to dry in car got chrome to computer room. started games sweeps. i paid city utilities online. i stopped for good lunch cheese enchiladas, beans, squash. ted came to sit after inge left. i left him there when signal quit to go upstairs. a first, i didn't feel guilty. my family trained me through threats and punishment to never leave them. there was always a price to pay for any fun and enjoyment i made. life is so much easier without the toxic people. they dumped all their poison for me to process. as a child i was helpless. living back home with them brought it all back. i enabled them.
give me love. give me help.
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