6;30

I'M NOT MOVING ENOUGH.  I START EXERCISING, GET DISTRACTED BY SOMETHING I WANT TO DO  AND ON TO THE NEXT THING.  SO I'M STRETCHING A LITTLE HERE A LITTLE THERE.  I KNOW AILEEN HAS IT TOO.  SHE NEVER FINISHED ANYTHING SHE STARTED.  MOM WOULD MAKE ME DO IT.  MOM WAS ALWAYS THREATENING TO KILL ME.  I STOPPED FEARING DYING AND BEGAN TO LOOK FORWARD TO THE END OF HER RANTING AND RAVING.  SHE COULD GET PRETTY CRAZY AFTER SO MANY YEARS OF PRACTICE.  PRACTICE DOES MAKE PERFECT.  SHE WAS AN EXPERT AT INTIMIDATION AND MANIPULATION.  AILEEN JUST LIES.  MITZI ARGUES AND MAKES UP RIDICULOUS EXCUSES.  A DIFFERENT FORM OF LYING.

I PUT OUT THE RECYCLE AND GARBAGE BINS.  MOM ALWAYS MADE SUCH A BIG DEAL ABOUT IT.  SHE MADE A BIG DEAL ABOUT EVERYTHING.  HER DEATH WAS A BIG DEAL, THE EXECUTION OF HER WILL AND LIVING TRUST WAS A BIG DEAL.  AILEEN RETAINED 4 SEPARATE LAWYERS TO CHANGE HER FROM EXECUTOR TO SUCCESSOR, MEANING SHE'D REPLACE MOM.  HER LIFE'S AMBITION, WHAT SHE WAS TRAINED TO BE.  MOM TURNED AILEEN INTO THE MOM OF THE FAMILY.  THEN MOM DIDN'T HAVE TO GROW UP.  IT WAS ILLEGAL BUT AILEEN DIDN'T CARE.  MOM TAUGHT HER.

AFTER DAD DIED MOM BECAME MORE AFRAID.  MOM HAD A HARD TIME CONCENTRATING DUE TO SADNESS AND SAID SHE WAS GETTING SENILE.  I POINTED OUT SHE WAS THE SAME SHE'D ALWAYS BEEN AND NEVER NOTICED BEFORE.  I GOT HER SOME MANILA FOLDERS AND ORGANIZED HER ANNUITIES.  SHE TOLD AILEEN TO PROD AILEEN INTO ORGANIZING HER MEDS.

MOM CREATED AN ATMOSPHERE OF COMPETITION.  AILEEN AND MITZI PLAYED ALONG.  I JUST COULDN'T.  MY BODY RECOILED FROM DOING ANYTHING DETRIMENTAL.  I'D FEEL SICK WHEN DOING ANYTHING BAD FOR ME.  MOM JUST DID WHAT SHE KNEW.  PROBABLY FROM HER FATHER.  MOM WAS ONE OF SIX KIDS, THE YOUNGEST GIRL IN AN ASIAN FAMILY.  A THROW AWAY CHILD.  SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF HER PARENTS BUT RAN AWAY TO SET UP HER OWN QUEENDOM.
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10;20 AM TOMAS CALLED TO SEE IF I NEEDED TOILET PAPER OR SANITIZER.  HE'S AT WORK.

I WENT TO PICK UP TINY LUNCH, PROCEEDED TO LAUNDRY, PLUGGED IN PHONE - CHROME, ATE MY LUNCH, FILLED OUT APRIL MENU, WATCHED BIG SCREEN NEWS, RESCUED 5 BOTTLES FROM TRASH, FOUND WET TEE IN MACHINE. LEARNED WARM WATER COSTS EXTRA 25 CENTS SO COLD IT IS.  WALTER DIDN'T SHOW UP.

I SAVED 50 DOLLARS NOT BUYING 4 DRESSES.  TARGET 2 SALADS ON GIFT CARD.  I WALKED ALL OVER THE STORE LOOKING FOR A WORKING PRICING KIOSK FOR JUMANJI 3. THE 6TH ONE I FOUND FINALLY HAD A SIGN THEY'RE ALL TURNED OFF FOR SAFETY.  YEAH RIGHT.   AND HOME 2 PM HANGING CLOTHES.  I DRESSED TOO WARM ON BRIGHT SUNNY NOT EXPECTED RAINY DAY.  SO I'M WEARING WET FOUND TEE TO COOL DOWN.

CATHY TEXTED ME THINKING I WAS HER LANDLADY.  I CALLED TO LET HER KNOW THE OTHER SUSAN.  SHE SOLD HER CAR FOR LIVING EXPENSES.  I WENT ONLINE TO FIND OUT HOW MUCH THE 3 CASES OF COSTCO WATER COST TO PAY HER FOR THEM BUT I'D HAVE TO LOG IN.  THEN I REMEMBERED SHE NEVER MENTIONED EDD.  SHE HAS A JOB WITH THE POSTPONED CENSUS AS A SUPERVISOR.  SHE MUST BE ELIGIBLE FOR UNEMPLOYMENT.  SHE'S BEEN PAYING INTO IT FOR YEARS.  SHE'S TRYING FOR DISABILITY.  MAYBE I'LL GO TO COSTCO MANANA.