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I'VE LIVED MY LIFE UNABLE TO FEEL, PUSHED BEYOND FEAR AND TERROR.   I OVERLOADED ON FEAR AND TERROR AND STOPPED FEELING ANYTHING. 

I DREAMED I WAS HIDING ON TOP OF A TALL CABINET IN AN OPEN CLOSET FROM A WILD ANTLERED DEER AILEEN.

I WONDER IF I'M WHO I THINK I AM.  I DON'T KNOW.