my toddler self is hissing

remembered Costco 6:40 am

new route to Santa Clara.  I tried Martin Ave.  good way to home Depot to order water softener salt.  10 cents a gal more than Sunnyvale.  huh.

4 fires are now 8 and my sinuses are still draining.  5 years since I stopped smoking.  i'm so glad I quit.  The air quality is so bad.  all the tv warnings that smoking is brain poison maybe why dad acted retarded.  besides mom spoiling him rotten.

Walter showed up while I was researching the bookmobile and quest lab diagnostics schedule.  we all need human contact.  lunch was good.  a lot went out for barbecue on the patio.  not worth $7 to me when staff eats for free.  I got a plate of leftover fried rice I ate at 3.  

I got home at 2 pm, no games due to baseball.  oh well.  no games at 5 pm.  

sprouts CBD new 7 am open

and I don't mind.  maybe the CBD.  i'll try it b4 bed.  time for the tub.  my hips feel so tight I can't cut my nails.  and I need petrol.  tomorrow.  

checked and picked up mission hold.  bookmobile 25 exp.  

home rest 3 pm tried 1 gummy bedtime 9 pm.

walter's here-b'day

mini's sick.  she's an old sick hen.  he couldn't sleep with her coughing.  he brought her to exercise her.  she isn't moving.  we sat downstairs and she improved.  I told him the smoke from the fires(4) are bothering her tiny lungs.  she needs air conditioning.  people and animals will feel low grade anxiety from smoke whether conscious or not.  the body signals danger.

he went home to nap.  he returned sans chickens to enjoy lunch.  new behavior not care taking.  I was so proud of him and I told him so.  he tried dragging up the past I kept him with the group.  Toki, Fred, Mike, Jane.  

old men

so noisy.   I suppose they're afraid of fading quietly away.  i puzzled to my heart's content.  

oh, so good.  i worked out all aches and pains in an hour in the tub.  

i scored 2025 calendars, cards, gift wrap and stickers.  Ron got cookies. 

i considered sunny i need rest.  i did a lot of exercise.  today and tomorrow preempted wheel.

refreshed after day of rest. heavenly dad day 24 hour gym

I never took the time.  I could hear mom screeching at me on that endless critical recording.  today with my feet up chrome charging.

i showered, updated blog, filled waters, online Arby's order.  9 am drove to Bernardo.  learned i must pay online arby's wi-fi disconnected i walked to Safeway, walked store, used wifi for 5/$5.  traffic light i drove to mtn view nob hill huge farmers' market design.  i walked for an hour.  home noon.  I ate one and half roast beef plain.  I was ready for a 2 hour nap.  

i'm feeling mellow

I picked up freebie lucky's candy.  Inge shared her cheese coffee cake a new flavor senior snack bar.  she eats the yogurt here for b'fast.  

i've been using the bottled water refills to wash my car in sections.  a little every day.  so easy.  I've struggled my entire life life living according to other people.  Lee is trying to tell me I 'need' an AI computer.  he doesn't even know what AI is I explained.  

my knees have improved a little.  my right ribs are sore like never before.  I always wondered after my surgery the sadist nurse pulled the tube out at least 4 inches in my lung sac and no after effects, now it's sore.  

i'm sitting downstairs watching traffic in the parking lot.  11 am I saw Trudy.  I washed the left back panel of car.  i'm doing my life in sections.  life in manageable pieces.  

lunch with Fred and Mike 5 minutes late Dino made them wait.  hot dog yum I want more.  

binge watching "Trolls Band Together" i'm learning the roles of fathers, families, 'you gotta work hard to make it look easy' the story of my life.  

2 hours to finish puzzle

I sat finishing the puzzle and Sydney came to tell me he found his memory stick in the college computer from the night before.  prayer always works.

I felt exhausted from concentrating on his prayer.  I knew he'd find it.

I found sprouts' tacos $10 and 99 cent 3 croissant and donut holes.  I asked 2 people about missing CBD gummies.  I looked online not listed.  tomorrow shipment check after 10.  ok.  

i'm still signed into CSC

so weird.  every other day I've had to sign in.  powerful prayer work.  Sydney misplaced his stick drive.  Daily Word pray for others.

home 6 pm.

and you tube is back

I refuse to play when they set up blocks.  

91 degree 5:30 at main library.  lovely cool indoors.  I ate leftover lunch.  I watched people puzzler.  HEAVEN!!  I'm free!!

the TV series "WEDNESDAY" is me.  woe!  I'm looking for more.

new recording youtube

I picked up sale arare and doz eggs at nob.  updated everything guest internet.

oops!  I paid city and screen failed, lost everything.  took 2 hours regaining tabs.  blog posts vanished.  

lovely day resting

and back to busyness.  it disappeared.  it was here and it's gone.  post I wrote at home failed.  

10 am no cars strong cup city signal, when lot full weak signal.  i thought of going to sunny, gym 1 and 2 to check internet i can do later.  i need to pamper me.  gym Ginny from seniors loves complaining 15 minutes, shower then lucky's salad, cucumber and burritos.  home 1:30 r and r.

so relaxed and happy.

people think things make them happy.  wrong.  energy makes things.  happy energy, sad, angry.  thoughts are electrical impulses magnetizing our desires to us.  or obsessions or deep wounds.  

I picked up free Lucky's drink only 20 minutes walking the store to find it.  I went to sprouts still no CBD gummies I bought 2 roasted chicken breast boar's head sandwiches 99 cents each after discounts and 2 dark chocolate hazelnut spread $4.50 ea.  

I keep thinking Thursday is Friday.  I found my Panera gift card in my car console.  I've been looking for 2 days.

i can feel the bottoms of both feet and my hips are complaining about not sitting 2 hours for bingo.  my right hip feels broken.  I puzzled, digesting my lunch and home to rest and stretch.  tomorrow's another day.  CBD water makes my pain relax.  

out of the tub

I've been pondering our purpose.  can't be to entertain God.  or can it?

I got Ed and nurse watching a spider

in the tub I was wondering if spiders in their limited lives are smarter than people.  they control 8 legs.  I'm having trouble with 2.  i'm still stretching and exercising.  this is 52 years of scar tissue re modeling.  it explains the duration.  also the cbd is re setting my chemistry.

doing what i want and getting it done

new format.  I swam 2 hours, Brian showed up.  lunch of ground turkey overcooked pasta.  Fred had ketchup made it better.  Mike is such a happy child.  Toki cancelled lunch due to broken water heater Trudy said.  ooh, she probably called I have no idea where my phone is.  

I went to Main under parking closed I dropped off returns and checked st. just.  I detoured to Savers nothing walked the store and asked about CBD at Smart and Final none.  I detoured again to Star One and completed my banking checked ATM card.  Success.

I'm sitting in the cool sunny library.  sunny always a few degrees cooler 81 to 89.  I got the last leftovers so I have my dinner.  or I can leave it for the crows.  4 pm 79 to 89.  I checked YouTube for game shows and I can skip avoid commercials.  Hurrah!  so i watched 2 people puzzler and 2 people, place or thing.  i ate my dinner on the patio watching.  HEAVEN.

home 7 pm.  i considered and discarded sewing at library.  not today.  i have tricky fabrics.  

seniors

drove to nob for carnitas.  

it's Eric's b'day.  my body remembers when my mind forgets.  I swam.  

i love my senior center family.  Fred is back.  Mike and Toki.  

I puzzled, dropped off mail no home service friday or sat.  picked up 'secret' from mission.  home to rest. 

nob hill

an hour to update blog and shop clearance 2 7 oz grated Parmesan and 750 almond syrup $6.18 total.  Thursday disappeared I recreated post.  it's awesome I can drive .3 for internet.  that's new behavior.  I resented driving.  oh, my back is so sore.  I know it's nerve damage because it moves and shifts, pinching and relaxing.  like the info on whiplash pointed out.  I never allowed complete healing pushing and straining my body.  Hey, as a child I wasn't allowed feelings so I didn't know I could be pain free.  like my feet when I worked El Toro shoe store, I learned feet didn't have to hurt.  I learned to customize the fit.  proper fit=comfort.

st j lunch at the library

Charity and friend signed me up for lunch.  Chris told me only one, lunch or pantry.  not so.  2 sandwiches, Doritos, muffin.  I was hungry after 2 hours in tub.  last Saturday pools open 'til august.  

I saw Toki and Mike said hello in gym.  I played puzzle an hour then st just as they were closing.  

to bank or not to bank.