MY SLEEP TOOLS ARE TV AND CD. I SLEPT. I DID PRETTY WELL AFTER ALL I DID YESTERDAY. I'M SORE AND FEEL LOOSER. MY LEFT SIDE IS STILL A LITTLE TIGHT. I JUST HAVE TO REMEMBER TO STRETCH. 60% OF FITNESS.
I FILLED OUT APRIL MENU. I ONLY HAVE TO REMEMBER TO TURN IT IN. TOMORROW IS BANK DAY MAYBE. I'VE SPENT MY ENTIRE LIFE MOTIVATED BY THREATS AND FEAR. NEWNESS IS SCARY. MUST BE HARDWIRED. ISN'T LOGICAL TO BE AFRAID WITHOUT REASON BEHIND IT.
LIVING LIFE FROM DESIRE IS DIFFERENT.
I'VE NEVER WANTED TO LIVE BEFORE.
Tuesday, March 31, 2020
Monday, March 30, 2020
6;30
I'M NOT MOVING ENOUGH. I START EXERCISING, GET DISTRACTED BY SOMETHING I WANT TO DO AND ON TO THE NEXT THING. SO I'M STRETCHING A LITTLE HERE A LITTLE THERE. I KNOW AILEEN HAS IT TOO. SHE NEVER FINISHED ANYTHING SHE STARTED. MOM WOULD MAKE ME DO IT. MOM WAS ALWAYS THREATENING TO KILL ME. I STOPPED FEARING DYING AND BEGAN TO LOOK FORWARD TO THE END OF HER RANTING AND RAVING. SHE COULD GET PRETTY CRAZY AFTER SO MANY YEARS OF PRACTICE. PRACTICE DOES MAKE PERFECT. SHE WAS AN EXPERT AT INTIMIDATION AND MANIPULATION. AILEEN JUST LIES. MITZI ARGUES AND MAKES UP RIDICULOUS EXCUSES. A DIFFERENT FORM OF LYING.
I PUT OUT THE RECYCLE AND GARBAGE BINS. MOM ALWAYS MADE SUCH A BIG DEAL ABOUT IT. SHE MADE A BIG DEAL ABOUT EVERYTHING. HER DEATH WAS A BIG DEAL, THE EXECUTION OF HER WILL AND LIVING TRUST WAS A BIG DEAL. AILEEN RETAINED 4 SEPARATE LAWYERS TO CHANGE HER FROM EXECUTOR TO SUCCESSOR, MEANING SHE'D REPLACE MOM. HER LIFE'S AMBITION, WHAT SHE WAS TRAINED TO BE. MOM TURNED AILEEN INTO THE MOM OF THE FAMILY. THEN MOM DIDN'T HAVE TO GROW UP. IT WAS ILLEGAL BUT AILEEN DIDN'T CARE. MOM TAUGHT HER.
AFTER DAD DIED MOM BECAME MORE AFRAID. MOM HAD A HARD TIME CONCENTRATING DUE TO SADNESS AND SAID SHE WAS GETTING SENILE. I POINTED OUT SHE WAS THE SAME SHE'D ALWAYS BEEN AND NEVER NOTICED BEFORE. I GOT HER SOME MANILA FOLDERS AND ORGANIZED HER ANNUITIES. SHE TOLD AILEEN TO PROD AILEEN INTO ORGANIZING HER MEDS.
MOM CREATED AN ATMOSPHERE OF COMPETITION. AILEEN AND MITZI PLAYED ALONG. I JUST COULDN'T. MY BODY RECOILED FROM DOING ANYTHING DETRIMENTAL. I'D FEEL SICK WHEN DOING ANYTHING BAD FOR ME. MOM JUST DID WHAT SHE KNEW. PROBABLY FROM HER FATHER. MOM WAS ONE OF SIX KIDS, THE YOUNGEST GIRL IN AN ASIAN FAMILY. A THROW AWAY CHILD. SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF HER PARENTS BUT RAN AWAY TO SET UP HER OWN QUEENDOM.
***********************
10;20 AM TOMAS CALLED TO SEE IF I NEEDED TOILET PAPER OR SANITIZER. HE'S AT WORK.
I WENT TO PICK UP TINY LUNCH, PROCEEDED TO LAUNDRY, PLUGGED IN PHONE - CHROME, ATE MY LUNCH, FILLED OUT APRIL MENU, WATCHED BIG SCREEN NEWS, RESCUED 5 BOTTLES FROM TRASH, FOUND WET TEE IN MACHINE. LEARNED WARM WATER COSTS EXTRA 25 CENTS SO COLD IT IS. WALTER DIDN'T SHOW UP.
I SAVED 50 DOLLARS NOT BUYING 4 DRESSES. TARGET 2 SALADS ON GIFT CARD. I WALKED ALL OVER THE STORE LOOKING FOR A WORKING PRICING KIOSK FOR JUMANJI 3. THE 6TH ONE I FOUND FINALLY HAD A SIGN THEY'RE ALL TURNED OFF FOR SAFETY. YEAH RIGHT. AND HOME 2 PM HANGING CLOTHES. I DRESSED TOO WARM ON BRIGHT SUNNY NOT EXPECTED RAINY DAY. SO I'M WEARING WET FOUND TEE TO COOL DOWN.
CATHY TEXTED ME THINKING I WAS HER LANDLADY. I CALLED TO LET HER KNOW THE OTHER SUSAN. SHE SOLD HER CAR FOR LIVING EXPENSES. I WENT ONLINE TO FIND OUT HOW MUCH THE 3 CASES OF COSTCO WATER COST TO PAY HER FOR THEM BUT I'D HAVE TO LOG IN. THEN I REMEMBERED SHE NEVER MENTIONED EDD. SHE HAS A JOB WITH THE POSTPONED CENSUS AS A SUPERVISOR. SHE MUST BE ELIGIBLE FOR UNEMPLOYMENT. SHE'S BEEN PAYING INTO IT FOR YEARS. SHE'S TRYING FOR DISABILITY. MAYBE I'LL GO TO COSTCO MANANA.
I PUT OUT THE RECYCLE AND GARBAGE BINS. MOM ALWAYS MADE SUCH A BIG DEAL ABOUT IT. SHE MADE A BIG DEAL ABOUT EVERYTHING. HER DEATH WAS A BIG DEAL, THE EXECUTION OF HER WILL AND LIVING TRUST WAS A BIG DEAL. AILEEN RETAINED 4 SEPARATE LAWYERS TO CHANGE HER FROM EXECUTOR TO SUCCESSOR, MEANING SHE'D REPLACE MOM. HER LIFE'S AMBITION, WHAT SHE WAS TRAINED TO BE. MOM TURNED AILEEN INTO THE MOM OF THE FAMILY. THEN MOM DIDN'T HAVE TO GROW UP. IT WAS ILLEGAL BUT AILEEN DIDN'T CARE. MOM TAUGHT HER.
AFTER DAD DIED MOM BECAME MORE AFRAID. MOM HAD A HARD TIME CONCENTRATING DUE TO SADNESS AND SAID SHE WAS GETTING SENILE. I POINTED OUT SHE WAS THE SAME SHE'D ALWAYS BEEN AND NEVER NOTICED BEFORE. I GOT HER SOME MANILA FOLDERS AND ORGANIZED HER ANNUITIES. SHE TOLD AILEEN TO PROD AILEEN INTO ORGANIZING HER MEDS.
MOM CREATED AN ATMOSPHERE OF COMPETITION. AILEEN AND MITZI PLAYED ALONG. I JUST COULDN'T. MY BODY RECOILED FROM DOING ANYTHING DETRIMENTAL. I'D FEEL SICK WHEN DOING ANYTHING BAD FOR ME. MOM JUST DID WHAT SHE KNEW. PROBABLY FROM HER FATHER. MOM WAS ONE OF SIX KIDS, THE YOUNGEST GIRL IN AN ASIAN FAMILY. A THROW AWAY CHILD. SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF HER PARENTS BUT RAN AWAY TO SET UP HER OWN QUEENDOM.
***********************
10;20 AM TOMAS CALLED TO SEE IF I NEEDED TOILET PAPER OR SANITIZER. HE'S AT WORK.
I WENT TO PICK UP TINY LUNCH, PROCEEDED TO LAUNDRY, PLUGGED IN PHONE - CHROME, ATE MY LUNCH, FILLED OUT APRIL MENU, WATCHED BIG SCREEN NEWS, RESCUED 5 BOTTLES FROM TRASH, FOUND WET TEE IN MACHINE. LEARNED WARM WATER COSTS EXTRA 25 CENTS SO COLD IT IS. WALTER DIDN'T SHOW UP.
I SAVED 50 DOLLARS NOT BUYING 4 DRESSES. TARGET 2 SALADS ON GIFT CARD. I WALKED ALL OVER THE STORE LOOKING FOR A WORKING PRICING KIOSK FOR JUMANJI 3. THE 6TH ONE I FOUND FINALLY HAD A SIGN THEY'RE ALL TURNED OFF FOR SAFETY. YEAH RIGHT. AND HOME 2 PM HANGING CLOTHES. I DRESSED TOO WARM ON BRIGHT SUNNY NOT EXPECTED RAINY DAY. SO I'M WEARING WET FOUND TEE TO COOL DOWN.
CATHY TEXTED ME THINKING I WAS HER LANDLADY. I CALLED TO LET HER KNOW THE OTHER SUSAN. SHE SOLD HER CAR FOR LIVING EXPENSES. I WENT ONLINE TO FIND OUT HOW MUCH THE 3 CASES OF COSTCO WATER COST TO PAY HER FOR THEM BUT I'D HAVE TO LOG IN. THEN I REMEMBERED SHE NEVER MENTIONED EDD. SHE HAS A JOB WITH THE POSTPONED CENSUS AS A SUPERVISOR. SHE MUST BE ELIGIBLE FOR UNEMPLOYMENT. SHE'S BEEN PAYING INTO IT FOR YEARS. SHE'S TRYING FOR DISABILITY. MAYBE I'LL GO TO COSTCO MANANA.
Sunday, March 29, 2020
Saturday, March 28, 2020
showered
13 DAYS I COULDN'T WAIT TO WASH MY HAIR AND USED THE HALL SHOWER WHERE MOM DIED. THE SCREEN WAS PLUGGED. NEXT TIME WILL BE BETTER. I CLEANED IT. I DECIDED NOT TO THINK AND JUST DID. I USED MY LONG WHITE TERRY ROBE THAT'S BEEN HANGING FOR MAYBE 10 YEARS. I CAN LAUNDRY WASH AND DRY MONDAY. I DIDN'T HAVE A FACE CLOTH OR HAIR TOWEL AND IT WAS OK. I'M LESS FUSSY. OBSSESIVE/COMPULSIVE.
I WENT THROUGH THE MEALS AND PLANNED WHAT I WANTED WHEN. MORE ORANGES ONE A DAY. I'M WAITING 'TIL I'M HUNGRY.
1;30 I PEANUT BUTTERED THE FRESH SOFT BAGEL AND MY GIFT CARD CEASAR SALAD, HEAVENLY. ELLA ENCHANTED ON CHANNEL 36 AND IGOR 35.5.
WOW, WALTER CALLED 65 MINUTES, CATHY 21. I MAY HAVE TO UP MY MINUTES.
I WENT THROUGH THE MEALS AND PLANNED WHAT I WANTED WHEN. MORE ORANGES ONE A DAY. I'M WAITING 'TIL I'M HUNGRY.
1;30 I PEANUT BUTTERED THE FRESH SOFT BAGEL AND MY GIFT CARD CEASAR SALAD, HEAVENLY. ELLA ENCHANTED ON CHANNEL 36 AND IGOR 35.5.
WOW, WALTER CALLED 65 MINUTES, CATHY 21. I MAY HAVE TO UP MY MINUTES.
Friday, March 27, 2020
laff laundry closed
THEY WERE OPEN YESTERDAY WHEN I DROVE BY BUT CLOSED TODAY. SO I WENT WINCHESTER. $2 FOR 2X LOAD AND CARDS SWIPED. I FIGURED OUT HOW AFTER I THOUGHT FOR 10 MINUTES. THERE'S 3 BUTTONS DEPENDING ON WHERE THE STRIP IS LOCATED. I'M EXCITED. MAYBE I'LL WASH MONDAY TOO.
I THOUGHT OF TOMORROW BUT 1) CLOTHES WON'T BE DRY, 2) NO SENIOR LUNCH.
SO I'M HERE WAITING IN LINE
I THOUGHT OF TOMORROW BUT 1) CLOTHES WON'T BE DRY, 2) NO SENIOR LUNCH.
SO I'M HERE WAITING IN LINE
Thursday, March 26, 2020
HOT IN CLEVELAND 2015
I'M WATCHING ON TV AND DON'T REMEMBER IT. I HAD THE ENTIRE SERIES FROM THE LIBRARY. I'LL HAVE TO WATCH IT AGAIN.
OUTRAGEOUS AND HILARIOUS.
OUTRAGEOUS AND HILARIOUS.
LIFE IS TRAGEDY/COMEDY
I THINK, HOPE, PRAY MORE COMEDY.
WE'RE LIVING OLDEN TIMES. ISOLATION WAS THE NORM. BEFORE VAST POPULATIONS TRIBAL FAMILIES LIVED IN ISOLATION. ALWAYS TRAVELING TO A BETTER WORLD. NEVER MAKING THE WORLD BETTER.
THE IDEA OF PUNISHMENT IS OSTRACISM. BEING IN A CELL ALONE TO THINK. WE'RE LIVING IT. WE CREATED THE SITUATION BY POPULATION CONCENTRATION AND TRAVEL. ALL COVID 19 EPI-CENTERS ARE TRAVEL CENTERS. WHERE PEOPLE PASS THROUGH TO OTHER PLACES INFECTING OTHERS.
I WENT TO PICK UP VITAMINS, WIPES AND MOUTH WASH. SCU SAFEWAY ZERO. GETTING TO SENIORS 10;45 8 PEOPLE AHEAD OF ME. I LOOKED OVER WALMART CATALOG. LINE STARTED MOVING AT 11. KEPT MOVING TODAY. PORK FRIED RICE HALF FAT. GLAD I WENT TO TARGET 2 SALADS AND MC FROZEN CHICKEN BURRITO BOWL UNDER 10 USED GIFT CARDS FREE. AND I STILL HAVE CHILI AND CORNBREAD. OMEED SAID APRIL MENUS TOMORROW. WE'LL SEE.
IT WAS BEAUTIFUL SUNNY. NOW IT'S OVERCAST 2 PM. TODAY MONK MARATHON. SO TOMORROW LAUNDRY. I CAN CHARGE MY CHROME AND PHONE.
I STILL HAVEN'T CLEARED OUT MY ASHTRAYS. SMOKING WAS SUCH A BIG PART OF MY LIFE. I WAS BORN WITH IT. MOM AND DAD MANY BEHAVIORS AROUND IT. AILEEN TOOK DAD'S BIG EMERALD ASHTRAY FROM ME 2001. AARON SMOKED. I WONDER IF HE STILL DOES. THE SINS OF THE FATHERS.
WE'RE LIVING OLDEN TIMES. ISOLATION WAS THE NORM. BEFORE VAST POPULATIONS TRIBAL FAMILIES LIVED IN ISOLATION. ALWAYS TRAVELING TO A BETTER WORLD. NEVER MAKING THE WORLD BETTER.
THE IDEA OF PUNISHMENT IS OSTRACISM. BEING IN A CELL ALONE TO THINK. WE'RE LIVING IT. WE CREATED THE SITUATION BY POPULATION CONCENTRATION AND TRAVEL. ALL COVID 19 EPI-CENTERS ARE TRAVEL CENTERS. WHERE PEOPLE PASS THROUGH TO OTHER PLACES INFECTING OTHERS.
I WENT TO PICK UP VITAMINS, WIPES AND MOUTH WASH. SCU SAFEWAY ZERO. GETTING TO SENIORS 10;45 8 PEOPLE AHEAD OF ME. I LOOKED OVER WALMART CATALOG. LINE STARTED MOVING AT 11. KEPT MOVING TODAY. PORK FRIED RICE HALF FAT. GLAD I WENT TO TARGET 2 SALADS AND MC FROZEN CHICKEN BURRITO BOWL UNDER 10 USED GIFT CARDS FREE. AND I STILL HAVE CHILI AND CORNBREAD. OMEED SAID APRIL MENUS TOMORROW. WE'LL SEE.
IT WAS BEAUTIFUL SUNNY. NOW IT'S OVERCAST 2 PM. TODAY MONK MARATHON. SO TOMORROW LAUNDRY. I CAN CHARGE MY CHROME AND PHONE.
I STILL HAVEN'T CLEARED OUT MY ASHTRAYS. SMOKING WAS SUCH A BIG PART OF MY LIFE. I WAS BORN WITH IT. MOM AND DAD MANY BEHAVIORS AROUND IT. AILEEN TOOK DAD'S BIG EMERALD ASHTRAY FROM ME 2001. AARON SMOKED. I WONDER IF HE STILL DOES. THE SINS OF THE FATHERS.
Wednesday, March 25, 2020
FULLER BRUSH GIRL
LUCILLE BALL 9/15/1950, HUH. I SPENT MANY A HAPPY SATURDAY AFTERNOON ALONE WATCHING COMEDIES. RED SKELTON FULLER BRUSH MAN.
THE WHOLE WORLD IS EXPERIENCING THE ISOLATION I ENDURED MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD.
I'M READING MY BOOKS AND WATCHING ALL THE MOVIES I'VE BOUGHT OVER THE YEARS.
PICKING UP LUNCH IS MY ONLY OUTING. I STOPPED AT SCU SAFEWAY. STILL EMPTY SHELVES. A LOT OF PEOPLE I'VE NEVER SEEN AT SENIOR LUNCH ARE PICKING UP HOT MEALS. JOHN FROM ST JUSTIN SENIOR OUTREACH IN HIS AUDI. I'M SURE HE CAN AFFORD EATING GRAB AND GO. MAYBE NOT.
I ATE 3 PCS CHOCOLATE, 2 KIT KAT 1 REESE'S CUP, FELL ASLEEP AND DREAMED I WENT TO ST JUSTIN STORE. UNLOCKED SO I WENT IN AND THE TEENS SHOWED UP. EVENTUALLY JOHN CAME AND NO ONE ASKED HOW I GOT IN.
THE WHOLE WORLD IS EXPERIENCING THE ISOLATION I ENDURED MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD.
I'M READING MY BOOKS AND WATCHING ALL THE MOVIES I'VE BOUGHT OVER THE YEARS.
PICKING UP LUNCH IS MY ONLY OUTING. I STOPPED AT SCU SAFEWAY. STILL EMPTY SHELVES. A LOT OF PEOPLE I'VE NEVER SEEN AT SENIOR LUNCH ARE PICKING UP HOT MEALS. JOHN FROM ST JUSTIN SENIOR OUTREACH IN HIS AUDI. I'M SURE HE CAN AFFORD EATING GRAB AND GO. MAYBE NOT.
I ATE 3 PCS CHOCOLATE, 2 KIT KAT 1 REESE'S CUP, FELL ASLEEP AND DREAMED I WENT TO ST JUSTIN STORE. UNLOCKED SO I WENT IN AND THE TEENS SHOWED UP. EVENTUALLY JOHN CAME AND NO ONE ASKED HOW I GOT IN.
Tuesday, March 24, 2020
never been loved
I AWOKE KNOWING I'VE NEVER FELT A MOTHER'S LOVE. I FEEL SO SAD.
AT SCU SAFEWAY I REDEEMED MY POINTS FOR THE GIFT CARD AND BOUGHT 7 OZ TERIYAKI JERKY 5.50. MAYBE TOMORROW I'LL VISIT COSTCO. I THOUGHT ABOUT IT PICKING UP LUNCH BUT THE BLACK CLOUDS AND SPRINKLES PERSUADED ME TO GO HOME AND EAT MY TACO SALAD. I USED BALSAMIC DRESSING.
I READ WODEHOUSE WAITING IN LINE SO I WAS RELATIVELY HAPPY. CONTENT.
AT SCU SAFEWAY I REDEEMED MY POINTS FOR THE GIFT CARD AND BOUGHT 7 OZ TERIYAKI JERKY 5.50. MAYBE TOMORROW I'LL VISIT COSTCO. I THOUGHT ABOUT IT PICKING UP LUNCH BUT THE BLACK CLOUDS AND SPRINKLES PERSUADED ME TO GO HOME AND EAT MY TACO SALAD. I USED BALSAMIC DRESSING.
I READ WODEHOUSE WAITING IN LINE SO I WAS RELATIVELY HAPPY. CONTENT.
Monday, March 23, 2020
keeping track of time
MY BIG FEAR OF MISSING IMPORTANT DATES DRILLED INTO ME. SEEING MY PARENTS STRESS.
ALL MY FEARS ARE RISING WITHOUT DISTRACTIONS. generac home generator for shut offs.
ALL MY FEARS ARE RISING WITHOUT DISTRACTIONS. generac home generator for shut offs.
Sunday, March 22, 2020
WATCHING THE QUIET MAN
ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOVIES. PEOPLE MAKE LIFE SO DIFFICULT. THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A COMEDY AND TRAGEDY IS THE RESOLUTION OF THE DIFFICULTY. UNTIL THE END LIFE CAN BE EITHER. IN BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL THEY SAY EVERYTHING COMES OUT ALRIGHT AT THE END AND IF IT ISN'T ALRIGHT IT ISN'T THE END.
I HOPE I'M GLAD WHEN COVID IS RESOLVED. TWO WEEK MINIMUM INCUBATION. I'LL BE GLAD TO GET BACK TO REGULAR EXERCISE. I THINK. HOPE. PRAY.
TO AVOID DELETING ALL SETTINGS MAIL PAGE THINGY I MINIMIZE WINDOW FIRST. A GOOD HABIT.
I FINALLY SUCCESSFULLY LINKED ACCOUNTS. I'VE TRIED FOR YEARS GOT FRUSTRATED AND QUIT. I MADE TREAT SPAGHETTI FOR LUNCH. I'M EATING THE SAFEWAY FRENCH BREAD. I WANT TO LIE DOWN.
FEELS LIKE I'VE BEEN PUNCHED IN MY RIGHT EYE. IT WAS MY RIGHT TEMPLE. I'M PLAYING JIG SAW PUZZLE ONLINE.
I HOPE I'M GLAD WHEN COVID IS RESOLVED. TWO WEEK MINIMUM INCUBATION. I'LL BE GLAD TO GET BACK TO REGULAR EXERCISE. I THINK. HOPE. PRAY.
TO AVOID DELETING ALL SETTINGS MAIL PAGE THINGY I MINIMIZE WINDOW FIRST. A GOOD HABIT.
I FINALLY SUCCESSFULLY LINKED ACCOUNTS. I'VE TRIED FOR YEARS GOT FRUSTRATED AND QUIT. I MADE TREAT SPAGHETTI FOR LUNCH. I'M EATING THE SAFEWAY FRENCH BREAD. I WANT TO LIE DOWN.
FEELS LIKE I'VE BEEN PUNCHED IN MY RIGHT EYE. IT WAS MY RIGHT TEMPLE. I'M PLAYING JIG SAW PUZZLE ONLINE.
Saturday, March 21, 2020
MY MATERNAL GRANDMA
BABAN BROUGHT 3 GREY DRESSES WHEN SHE'D VISIT. EVERY MORNING SHE'D PUT ON HER DRESS AND AN APRON AND SWEEP THE FRONT. IT WAS SO NICE TO HAVE SOMEONE WAITING AT HOME. IT MUST HAVE BEEN BORING FOR HER. SHE DIDN'T SPEAK ENGLISH. I WONDER IF SHE UNDERSTOOD IT. IN HAWAII SHE HAD LOTS OF COMPANY. SHE RAISED ME MY FIRST TWO YEARS WHILE MOM WORKED AT THE CANNERY. MOM HATED HOUSEWORK. SH HAD US TO DO IT. SO WHEN BABAN WAS HERE WE GOT TO BE KIDS. I KNEW SHE LOVED ME.
Friday, March 20, 2020
only me
WHEN I LIVED HERE BEFORE I HAD 4 PEOPLE TO LOOK AFTER. NOW I'M LEARNING TO ACCEPT HELP. I DON'T KNOW IF LUNCH WILL BE SERVED BUT I'LL GO.
I WONDER WHAT MITZI WANTS. NOT ENOUGH TO CALL. NOW I KNOW WHY TOM CALLED 3 TIMES. I ALWAYS SUSPECTED AILEEN OF GOING BEHIND MY BACK TO INSINUATE HERSELF IN MY LIFE. SHE ADMITTED SHE STAYED IN TOUCH WITH EX. I SUSPECT SHE TRIED TO GET INFO OUT OF T AND WHEN I DIDN'T RESPOND SHE CONTACTED M. EXPLAINS THE ELECTRONICS. IT'S SPOTTY. TRYING TO GET MY ATTENTION. CHANNEL 7 WAS BACK LAST NIGHT. CD PLAYER IS WORKING AGAIN.
AILEEN HAS HATED OR MAYBE FEARED ME SINCE I WAS BORN. SHE'S ALWAYS BEEN SO SAD. I TOOK WHATEVER 'LOVE' THERE WAS.
MARCH DAD'S BIRTHDAY
APRIL AILEEN'S " ALWAYS BETWEEN MOM AND DAD
MAY MOM'S "
CHRIST SAID AS YOU DO TO THE LEAST YOU DO UNTO ME. THE HOMELESS LIVE LIFE ON THEIR TERMS. THEY CAN'T/WON'T COMPROMISE. THEY DON'T WANT TO OWN ANYTHING BUT THEMSELVES. THEY HAVE INTEGRITY, DIGNITY, HUMANITY
LUNCH DRIVE IN LINE, POP THE TRUNK, 3 MEALS FOR SATURDAY TOMORROW. 4 JUICE, 2 SANDWICH, TINY CROISSANT, BAGEL VAL SAID MONDAY DRIVE UP. SAME BAT TIME SAME BAT STATION.
TODAY'S DAILY WORD FORGIVENESS. EVERY DAY AN OPPORTUNITY TO RESET TO FACTORY SETTINGS.
I WONDER WHAT MITZI WANTS. NOT ENOUGH TO CALL. NOW I KNOW WHY TOM CALLED 3 TIMES. I ALWAYS SUSPECTED AILEEN OF GOING BEHIND MY BACK TO INSINUATE HERSELF IN MY LIFE. SHE ADMITTED SHE STAYED IN TOUCH WITH EX. I SUSPECT SHE TRIED TO GET INFO OUT OF T AND WHEN I DIDN'T RESPOND SHE CONTACTED M. EXPLAINS THE ELECTRONICS. IT'S SPOTTY. TRYING TO GET MY ATTENTION. CHANNEL 7 WAS BACK LAST NIGHT. CD PLAYER IS WORKING AGAIN.
AILEEN HAS HATED OR MAYBE FEARED ME SINCE I WAS BORN. SHE'S ALWAYS BEEN SO SAD. I TOOK WHATEVER 'LOVE' THERE WAS.
MARCH DAD'S BIRTHDAY
APRIL AILEEN'S " ALWAYS BETWEEN MOM AND DAD
MAY MOM'S "
CHRIST SAID AS YOU DO TO THE LEAST YOU DO UNTO ME. THE HOMELESS LIVE LIFE ON THEIR TERMS. THEY CAN'T/WON'T COMPROMISE. THEY DON'T WANT TO OWN ANYTHING BUT THEMSELVES. THEY HAVE INTEGRITY, DIGNITY, HUMANITY
LUNCH DRIVE IN LINE, POP THE TRUNK, 3 MEALS FOR SATURDAY TOMORROW. 4 JUICE, 2 SANDWICH, TINY CROISSANT, BAGEL VAL SAID MONDAY DRIVE UP. SAME BAT TIME SAME BAT STATION.
TODAY'S DAILY WORD FORGIVENESS. EVERY DAY AN OPPORTUNITY TO RESET TO FACTORY SETTINGS.
Thursday, March 19, 2020
life is weirder
BEEN AWAKE 2 HOURS. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I WATCHED MOVIE, ATE MY CEREAL. I GUESS I COULD READ OR CATCH UP ON NEWS. EXERCISE.
A GLORIOUS DAY.
UGH. MITZI LEFT ME PHONE VOICEMAIL IF I WANT/NEED ANYTHING. YEAH RIGHT, SO SHE CAN DENY ME. LIKE THE TIGER BLANKET, RIDE TO HER HOUSE THANKSGIVING, WHEN I HAD SURGERY, BACK UP WITH AILEEN'S HARASSMENT, ETC. MITZI KEPT INSISTING I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE PURPLE COMFORTER. SO SAD TO LOSE MY SISTERS (WHEN DAD AND MOM DIED) OVER THE ESTATE.
EVERYTHING I'VE EVER ASKED OF THEM THEY'VE DENIED ME. THEY LEARNED IT FROM MOM AND DAD AND THEY DIED SADLY, MISERABLY. UNTIL THEY LEARN SOMETHING DIFFERENT I WON'T BE AROUND THEM.
THEIR BETRAYAL IS A MAJOR COMPONENT OF MY DEPRESSION. I'M BETTER. I DON'T BELIEVE THEIR LIES.
SENIORS LUNCH IS PICK UP ONLY. BACK PARKING LOT. AT LEAST THEY STARTED 11;10. TOMORROW DRIVE UP, PICK UP AND MAYBE MEAL FOR WEEKEND. WE'LL SEE. I RETURNED HOME IN TIME FOR MONK MARATHON. I PUT ON HEADPHONES AND LISTENED TO CD AND READ P G WODEHOUSE LITTLE WARRIOR ONLINE AT GUTENBERG. FELL ASLEEP.
CHANNEL 2 DISAPPEARED FROM LIVING ROOM TV AND 7 WON'T COME IN ON EITHER. EH, TONIGHT IS 5.
A GLORIOUS DAY.
UGH. MITZI LEFT ME PHONE VOICEMAIL IF I WANT/NEED ANYTHING. YEAH RIGHT, SO SHE CAN DENY ME. LIKE THE TIGER BLANKET, RIDE TO HER HOUSE THANKSGIVING, WHEN I HAD SURGERY, BACK UP WITH AILEEN'S HARASSMENT, ETC. MITZI KEPT INSISTING I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE PURPLE COMFORTER. SO SAD TO LOSE MY SISTERS (WHEN DAD AND MOM DIED) OVER THE ESTATE.
EVERYTHING I'VE EVER ASKED OF THEM THEY'VE DENIED ME. THEY LEARNED IT FROM MOM AND DAD AND THEY DIED SADLY, MISERABLY. UNTIL THEY LEARN SOMETHING DIFFERENT I WON'T BE AROUND THEM.
THEIR BETRAYAL IS A MAJOR COMPONENT OF MY DEPRESSION. I'M BETTER. I DON'T BELIEVE THEIR LIES.
SENIORS LUNCH IS PICK UP ONLY. BACK PARKING LOT. AT LEAST THEY STARTED 11;10. TOMORROW DRIVE UP, PICK UP AND MAYBE MEAL FOR WEEKEND. WE'LL SEE. I RETURNED HOME IN TIME FOR MONK MARATHON. I PUT ON HEADPHONES AND LISTENED TO CD AND READ P G WODEHOUSE LITTLE WARRIOR ONLINE AT GUTENBERG. FELL ASLEEP.
CHANNEL 2 DISAPPEARED FROM LIVING ROOM TV AND 7 WON'T COME IN ON EITHER. EH, TONIGHT IS 5.
Wednesday, March 18, 2020
BACK TO SLOW TIME
IT'S ONLY TUESDAY. THIS VIRUS IS SLOWING EVERYBODY DOWN. GIVING ALL TIME TO THINK, FEEL, CHANGE.
THE MEEK=TEACHABLE ARE INHERITING THE EARTH. REST IN PLACE. LEARNING FROM MISTAKES.
POSSIBLY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HISTORY THE OMISSIONS AND MISTAKES OF THE PAST ARE CONSIDERED. INSTEAD OF AN OUTER SPACE INVASION WE'RE EXPERIENCING AN ENEMY COMMON TO ALL MANKIND. AN INNER SPACE INVASION.
BIRD FLU, SWINE FLU, SPANISH FLU. EVERY YEAR A NEW BUG.
I FORGOT CARLOS UNTIL 8;50 GOT DRESSED, BRUSHED MY TEETH AND GOT THERE 9;18 I OVERHEARD HIM TALKING ON PHONE ABOUT UPCOMING SURGERY. WHEN I ASKED HE HAS EYE SURGERY 2 WEEKS. I TOLD HIM MODERN TECHNIQUES MAKE IT EASY. THEY'LL GIVE HIM EYE ANESTHETIC AND RELAXER. DAD HAD A CATARACT REMOVED AND IF HE HAD FOLLOWED DOCTOR'S ADVICE HE'D HAVE BEEN FINE.
$85.79 TOTAL. $45 CASH AND 5% DISCOVER FOR A DIRTY AIR SENSOR. CARLOS TOOK IT APART AND CLEANED IT. HALF HOUR. SO I CAME HOME, I FORGOT THE CHROME CHARGER. NICE TO HAVE ALL THAT TIME.
LUNCH WAS OK. COUNTY CAME TO CHECK COMPLIANCE. I GOT PORK, CAULIFLOWER, BROWN RICE LEFTOVER.
THE MEEK=TEACHABLE ARE INHERITING THE EARTH. REST IN PLACE. LEARNING FROM MISTAKES.
POSSIBLY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HISTORY THE OMISSIONS AND MISTAKES OF THE PAST ARE CONSIDERED. INSTEAD OF AN OUTER SPACE INVASION WE'RE EXPERIENCING AN ENEMY COMMON TO ALL MANKIND. AN INNER SPACE INVASION.
BIRD FLU, SWINE FLU, SPANISH FLU. EVERY YEAR A NEW BUG.
I FORGOT CARLOS UNTIL 8;50 GOT DRESSED, BRUSHED MY TEETH AND GOT THERE 9;18 I OVERHEARD HIM TALKING ON PHONE ABOUT UPCOMING SURGERY. WHEN I ASKED HE HAS EYE SURGERY 2 WEEKS. I TOLD HIM MODERN TECHNIQUES MAKE IT EASY. THEY'LL GIVE HIM EYE ANESTHETIC AND RELAXER. DAD HAD A CATARACT REMOVED AND IF HE HAD FOLLOWED DOCTOR'S ADVICE HE'D HAVE BEEN FINE.
$85.79 TOTAL. $45 CASH AND 5% DISCOVER FOR A DIRTY AIR SENSOR. CARLOS TOOK IT APART AND CLEANED IT. HALF HOUR. SO I CAME HOME, I FORGOT THE CHROME CHARGER. NICE TO HAVE ALL THAT TIME.
LUNCH WAS OK. COUNTY CAME TO CHECK COMPLIANCE. I GOT PORK, CAULIFLOWER, BROWN RICE LEFTOVER.
Tuesday, March 17, 2020
no 24
EMAIL LAST NIGHT FITNESS CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE. OH, WHAT TO DO.
SO NOW I KNOW WHY MALLORY GAVE ME WIPES. I USED PEROXIDE SPRAY TO WASH UNDIES. I WENT WALMART TO CHECK FOR SOUP AND PAID MY PGE.
ON TO SCU SAFEWAY I REDEEMED ALUMINUM AND REFRESH ICE. NO SALE SOUP.
SENIORS LUNCH IS 3 PEOPLE PER TABLE. IT WAS OK. I THEN WENT TO HOMESTEAD SAFEWAY NO SALE SOUP. 3 BOXES VALENTINES' CANDY. $1.60 EA.
I GOT HOME AND THE CHECK ENGINE LIGHT CAME ON. IT WAS STILL WARM SO I WENT AND GOT GAS COSTCO NO WAITING. IT'S BEEN SO COLD. THERE'S STILL SNOW ALONG THE MOUNTAIN TOPS. I DROVE HOME AND CALLED CARLOS FOR TOMORROW. I ATE CABBAGE AND CHIPS. WATCHED BRIGADOON.
I'M FEELING LOST AND SAD BECAUSE OF DAD. EITHER TODAY OR TOMORROW WOULD HAVE BEEN HIS BIRTHDAY. HE TOLD US TODAY BUT HIS CERTIFICATE SAID TOMORROW. I ALWAYS THINK I'M OK UNTIL I'M NOT. SO I ATE 4 PIECES OF CHOCOLATE CANDY.
SO NOW I KNOW WHY MALLORY GAVE ME WIPES. I USED PEROXIDE SPRAY TO WASH UNDIES. I WENT WALMART TO CHECK FOR SOUP AND PAID MY PGE.
ON TO SCU SAFEWAY I REDEEMED ALUMINUM AND REFRESH ICE. NO SALE SOUP.
SENIORS LUNCH IS 3 PEOPLE PER TABLE. IT WAS OK. I THEN WENT TO HOMESTEAD SAFEWAY NO SALE SOUP. 3 BOXES VALENTINES' CANDY. $1.60 EA.
I GOT HOME AND THE CHECK ENGINE LIGHT CAME ON. IT WAS STILL WARM SO I WENT AND GOT GAS COSTCO NO WAITING. IT'S BEEN SO COLD. THERE'S STILL SNOW ALONG THE MOUNTAIN TOPS. I DROVE HOME AND CALLED CARLOS FOR TOMORROW. I ATE CABBAGE AND CHIPS. WATCHED BRIGADOON.
I'M FEELING LOST AND SAD BECAUSE OF DAD. EITHER TODAY OR TOMORROW WOULD HAVE BEEN HIS BIRTHDAY. HE TOLD US TODAY BUT HIS CERTIFICATE SAID TOMORROW. I ALWAYS THINK I'M OK UNTIL I'M NOT. SO I ATE 4 PIECES OF CHOCOLATE CANDY.
Monday, March 16, 2020
SITTING
OUTSIDE SENIORS. I WENT $TORE FOR MOUTHWASH. STILL NOT MY FAVORITE. WELSUN CAME OVER TO PEER IN WINDOW. I'M BUSY.
I WENT TO DOLLAR STORE FOR MOUTHWASH. NOT MY FAVORITE. I CONSIDERED WHAT NEXT.
I QUICKLY WROTE ADDRESSES TO AUNTIE AND CATHY ON CARDS AND DROPPED THEM OFF AT PO. .2 MILE FROM HERE. SAME AS MY WALKS WHEN I WAS BEDRIDDEN. I'D WALK TO 7-11 FOR THE SUNDAY NEWSPAPER. I TRIED SUBSCRIPTION HOME DELIVERY TWICE AND THE PAPER EITHER CAME LATE (ONE TIME WEDNESDAY) OR FILTHY. THEN THE PAPER PERSON HAD THE NERVE TO PUT IN A SELF- ADDRESSED ENVELOPE TO SEND A CHRISTMAS TIP. AMAZING.
I WANT TO CHECK OUT SCU SAFEWAY LATER. I MAY GO 24 TOO.
I DON'T KNOW. I'M FREE.
I WENT TO SAFEWAY NO PARKING THE LUNCH CROWD AND SHOPPERS. SO I DECIDED TO SWING BY MAIL BOXES TO PAY PGE GONE/CLOSED. I PROCEEDED TO G-1. NO SUIT WRINGER BUT THE LAP POOL 85 AND WAY FEWER PEOPLE. I PADDLED AROUND 'TIL I REMEMBERED WOMBLING FREE ON TV. STRAIGHT HOME 2 PM. I CAN GO TO WALMART TO PAY PGE OR CUPERTINO OFFICE.
I'M DRINKING ALL THE JUICES I BOUGHT CLEARANCE. I HAVE A LOT. I LOVE MY FAVORITE COCONUT. I HAVE GRAPE AND TOMATO I CAN USE FOR A QUICK SOUP. I'M SO BLESSED.
I WENT TO DOLLAR STORE FOR MOUTHWASH. NOT MY FAVORITE. I CONSIDERED WHAT NEXT.
I QUICKLY WROTE ADDRESSES TO AUNTIE AND CATHY ON CARDS AND DROPPED THEM OFF AT PO. .2 MILE FROM HERE. SAME AS MY WALKS WHEN I WAS BEDRIDDEN. I'D WALK TO 7-11 FOR THE SUNDAY NEWSPAPER. I TRIED SUBSCRIPTION HOME DELIVERY TWICE AND THE PAPER EITHER CAME LATE (ONE TIME WEDNESDAY) OR FILTHY. THEN THE PAPER PERSON HAD THE NERVE TO PUT IN A SELF- ADDRESSED ENVELOPE TO SEND A CHRISTMAS TIP. AMAZING.
I WANT TO CHECK OUT SCU SAFEWAY LATER. I MAY GO 24 TOO.
I DON'T KNOW. I'M FREE.
I WENT TO SAFEWAY NO PARKING THE LUNCH CROWD AND SHOPPERS. SO I DECIDED TO SWING BY MAIL BOXES TO PAY PGE GONE/CLOSED. I PROCEEDED TO G-1. NO SUIT WRINGER BUT THE LAP POOL 85 AND WAY FEWER PEOPLE. I PADDLED AROUND 'TIL I REMEMBERED WOMBLING FREE ON TV. STRAIGHT HOME 2 PM. I CAN GO TO WALMART TO PAY PGE OR CUPERTINO OFFICE.
I'M DRINKING ALL THE JUICES I BOUGHT CLEARANCE. I HAVE A LOT. I LOVE MY FAVORITE COCONUT. I HAVE GRAPE AND TOMATO I CAN USE FOR A QUICK SOUP. I'M SO BLESSED.
Sunday, March 15, 2020
BETTER AND BETTER
I SLEPT 'TIL 8 ONLY GOT UP TWICE DURING THE NIGHT. I EXERCISED, SHOPPED SAFEWAY FROZEN GRILLED TILAPIA. DECIDED TO GO DOLLAR TREE I NEEDED MULTI VITAMINS FOR TOMORROW. I FOUND KETTLE CHIPS, PRINGLES, STAX, 2 BAGS DRIED FRUIT, ST PADDYS CARDS, HUNT'S PASTA SAUCE, MULTI.
GOT HOME 12;30 CONSIDERED LIBRARY BUT I CAN GO TOMORROW.
WATCHING OLD TV. FEELING YOUNG.
libraries are covid closed 'til 4/16. county and city.
GOT HOME 12;30 CONSIDERED LIBRARY BUT I CAN GO TOMORROW.
WATCHING OLD TV. FEELING YOUNG.
libraries are covid closed 'til 4/16. county and city.
Saturday, March 14, 2020
SPIES IN DISGUISE
2019 ANIME. IT HAS WALTER AND PIGEONS SAVING THE WORLD. I LIKE WILL SMITH AS A PIGEON.
IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE A RAINY DAY. WE'LL SEE.
IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE A RAINY DAY. WE'LL SEE.
Friday, March 13, 2020
good grief-THERSA CAPUTO
pg 120 TALKS ABOUT SYNAPTIC PRUNING. IT'S LIKE A RESET IN OUR BRAINS AT NIGHT WHILE WE SLEEP. REPROGRAMMING. EVERY MEMORY REINFORCES THE ELECTRICAL PATHWAY. OUR BRAINS ARE TOOLS LIKE OUR EGOS. EGO IS THE COMMUNICATION PROGRAM AND BRAIN THE INFORMATION WAREHOUSE.
WE CAN CHOOSE OUR PROGRAMMING. CHOOSE WHAT WE REINFORCE. GET OVER PTSD.
WE CAN CHOOSE OUR PROGRAMMING. CHOOSE WHAT WE REINFORCE. GET OVER PTSD.
Thursday, March 12, 2020
ARMAGEDDON
MAYBE THE J W'S DREAM IS BEING REALIZED. FROM 9-11 YEARS OLD WE STUDIED WITH THEM. THEY CAME TO THE HOUSE ONCE A WEEK TO STUDY THE BIBLE AND SUNDAYS 2 HOURS AT THE KINGDOM HALL ON HARD WOODEN PEWS. DAD QUIT DUE TO WITNESSING DOOR TO DOOR AND GIVING UP SMOKING AND BEER. HE DECIDED HIS SOUL WASN'T WORTH THE EFFORT. SO WE STOPPED. THAT'S WHERE AILEEN LEARNED QUITTING FROM DAD. I DREAMED OF A CECIL B DE MILLE EARTHQUAKE SWALLOWING THE UNJUST.
WE LEARN FROM THOSE MOST IMPORTANT TO US UNTIL WE LEARN TO TEACH OURSELVES. I WAS SO LUCKY TO BE THE MIDDLE CHILD IGNORED BY INTENSELY DYSFUNCTIONAL PARENTS.
THE MEEK=TEACHABLE INHERIT THE EARTH.
BEST DAY. I DIDN'T DO LAUNDRY BUT OH, WELL. I WENT TO SENIORS, PUZZLED, HAD LUNCH IN ROW 3. THEY REDUCED PLACE SETTINGS TO 4 AT A TABLE. I SAT ROW 3 WITH MARRIED COUPLE. HE GAVE ME THE LAST PORK LOIN LEFTOVER.
I WENT TO BATTERIES PLUS AND SAM PICKED OUT MY DC ADAPTER FOR THE CD PLAYER. HE EXPLAINED THE VOLTAGES AND FITTED THE PLUG FROM A UNIVERSAL KIT. TY SAM.
I CAN DO LAUNDRY TOMORROW IF THEY'RE OPEN. CENTER WON'T OPEN 'TIL 11 THE REST IS SHUT DOWN. EXERCISE, COMPUTER, POOL, ETC.
FREAKY.
WE LEARN FROM THOSE MOST IMPORTANT TO US UNTIL WE LEARN TO TEACH OURSELVES. I WAS SO LUCKY TO BE THE MIDDLE CHILD IGNORED BY INTENSELY DYSFUNCTIONAL PARENTS.
THE MEEK=TEACHABLE INHERIT THE EARTH.
BEST DAY. I DIDN'T DO LAUNDRY BUT OH, WELL. I WENT TO SENIORS, PUZZLED, HAD LUNCH IN ROW 3. THEY REDUCED PLACE SETTINGS TO 4 AT A TABLE. I SAT ROW 3 WITH MARRIED COUPLE. HE GAVE ME THE LAST PORK LOIN LEFTOVER.
I WENT TO BATTERIES PLUS AND SAM PICKED OUT MY DC ADAPTER FOR THE CD PLAYER. HE EXPLAINED THE VOLTAGES AND FITTED THE PLUG FROM A UNIVERSAL KIT. TY SAM.
I CAN DO LAUNDRY TOMORROW IF THEY'RE OPEN. CENTER WON'T OPEN 'TIL 11 THE REST IS SHUT DOWN. EXERCISE, COMPUTER, POOL, ETC.
FREAKY.
Wednesday, March 11, 2020
AM TIRES
EXPANDING AND REMODELING. I GOT THE LAST PARKING OLD LOT. THEY'RE ADDING WAREHOUSE AND PARKING. THE NEW TIRE MOLECULES MAKING MY NOSE AND EYES ITCH. RAMIRO SAID 2 HOUR WAIT. WE'LL SEE. I OFFERED TO BOOK APPOINTMENT COME BACK HE SAID I MIGHT GET IN EARLIER.
LUNCH WAS GOOD. ART AND I GOT FISH SANDWICH, SWEET POTATOES. HE GOT SLAW. I GAVE HIM MAY'S COOKIES. GERDA AND INGE SO WEIRD. THEY GIVE HIM ALL KINDS OF COOKIES, CANDIES, SWEETS BUT DON'T WANT ME TO.
THE ALMOND CROISSANTS ARE GREAT. I'M NOT SHARING. I HAD 2 LAST NIGHT.
BOOKMOBILE HAS TONS OF NEW LOONY TUNES. HURRAH!!
LUNCH WAS GOOD. ART AND I GOT FISH SANDWICH, SWEET POTATOES. HE GOT SLAW. I GAVE HIM MAY'S COOKIES. GERDA AND INGE SO WEIRD. THEY GIVE HIM ALL KINDS OF COOKIES, CANDIES, SWEETS BUT DON'T WANT ME TO.
THE ALMOND CROISSANTS ARE GREAT. I'M NOT SHARING. I HAD 2 LAST NIGHT.
BOOKMOBILE HAS TONS OF NEW LOONY TUNES. HURRAH!!
Tuesday, March 10, 2020
PARAKEET DREAM
I WAS VISITING IN HEAVEN AND FOUND MY 'KEET IN A CAGE IN MY ROOM. I LET HIM OUT AND HUGGED HIM. TOOK ME 3 MONTHS TO HAND TAME HIM. IT'S THE FIRST TIME I DREAMED OF HIM.
SECOND DAY OF VIRUS SCARE REMINDING ME OF DUCK AND COVER CHILDHOOD. WE HAD DRILLS AT SCHOOL DURING THE COLD WAR HIDING UNDER OUR DESKS IF MOFFETT FIELD WAS NUCLEAR BOMBED. WITHIN 10 MILES WE'D BE BLOWN AWAY TOO. LUDICROUS.
MUCH MORE LIKELY BEING SHOT. WE DON'T RUN DRILLS FOR THAT. TANFORAN WAS SHOT UP.
SECOND DAY OF VIRUS SCARE REMINDING ME OF DUCK AND COVER CHILDHOOD. WE HAD DRILLS AT SCHOOL DURING THE COLD WAR HIDING UNDER OUR DESKS IF MOFFETT FIELD WAS NUCLEAR BOMBED. WITHIN 10 MILES WE'D BE BLOWN AWAY TOO. LUDICROUS.
MUCH MORE LIKELY BEING SHOT. WE DON'T RUN DRILLS FOR THAT. TANFORAN WAS SHOT UP.
Monday, March 9, 2020
sigh
I HAVE BROWN RICE FROM LUNCH. DO I WANT LENTILS OR CHILI, WHAT DO I WANT.
FIRST DAY OF COVID FEWER HOURS 7-1 M-F. WE'LL SEE. MOST OF COUNTY CANCELLED PROGRAMS OF OVER 1 K.
OPENED CAN OF ARMOR TREAT. I LIKE IT BETTER THAN SPAM. IT'S LIKE THE INSIDE OF A HOT DOG W/O THE SKIN.
FIRST DAY OF COVID FEWER HOURS 7-1 M-F. WE'LL SEE. MOST OF COUNTY CANCELLED PROGRAMS OF OVER 1 K.
OPENED CAN OF ARMOR TREAT. I LIKE IT BETTER THAN SPAM. IT'S LIKE THE INSIDE OF A HOT DOG W/O THE SKIN.
Sunday, March 8, 2020
POWER OUTAGE DST RAINY
I LOVE HAVING THE LIGHT. IT WORKED OUT PERFECTLY. I WENT TO EXERCISE LATER AND EVERYONE WAS LATER. STILL NO HAND SANITIZE. I WENT TO CUPERTINO LIBRARY TO RETURN 3 DAY OVERDUE NO CHARGE 'CAUSE I'M OLD, HURRAH!
ON TO ST J I FOUND CATTY BANDANA $1. I HAD TO WASH IT. LUCKY I GOT THERE EARLY NEW PEOPLE SHOWED UP EARLY TAKING KAREN AND BERNIECE SEATS. LUNCH WAS THE BEST ST PADDY'S EVER. PERFECT. HOTTEST HORSE RADISH 2 MUSTARDS. VEGGIES PERFECT. IRISH SODA BREAD SWEET WITH RAISINS UGH. WHITE CHOCOLATE COOKIES WITH WALNUTS. I ALMOST DIDN'T TRY BECAUSE OF THE TERRIBLE RAISIN OATMEAL.
I CHARGED AT UML, READ PAPER, HOME 5;15 NO POWER. I WENT OUT BACK CHECKED BOX NOTHING. LOOKED ONLINE SVP POWER OUTAGE 3;49 HOPE TO RESTORE 6;30 >500, RESTORED OVER 1500, CAUSE UNKNOWN.
BLAME IT ON SQUIRRELS.
ON TO ST J I FOUND CATTY BANDANA $1. I HAD TO WASH IT. LUCKY I GOT THERE EARLY NEW PEOPLE SHOWED UP EARLY TAKING KAREN AND BERNIECE SEATS. LUNCH WAS THE BEST ST PADDY'S EVER. PERFECT. HOTTEST HORSE RADISH 2 MUSTARDS. VEGGIES PERFECT. IRISH SODA BREAD SWEET WITH RAISINS UGH. WHITE CHOCOLATE COOKIES WITH WALNUTS. I ALMOST DIDN'T TRY BECAUSE OF THE TERRIBLE RAISIN OATMEAL.
I CHARGED AT UML, READ PAPER, HOME 5;15 NO POWER. I WENT OUT BACK CHECKED BOX NOTHING. LOOKED ONLINE SVP POWER OUTAGE 3;49 HOPE TO RESTORE 6;30 >500, RESTORED OVER 1500, CAUSE UNKNOWN.
BLAME IT ON SQUIRRELS.
Saturday, March 7, 2020
Friday, March 6, 2020
BETTER
MY BACK IS HURTING IN A NEW WAY. I HOPE IT'S BETTER.
AS I WAS LEAVING MY PACKAGE OF 2 BACK BRACES AND GUM WAS ON THE FRONT PORCH 8 AM. I PUZZLED AND LUNCHED. VEGGIE SANDWICH LEFT OVER FOR DINNER. BROWNIE BITES. 2 SMALL PUZZLES IN BAGS. 1 PEN. GOOD DAY.
TOOK BACK 4 DVD MISSION.
AS I WAS LEAVING MY PACKAGE OF 2 BACK BRACES AND GUM WAS ON THE FRONT PORCH 8 AM. I PUZZLED AND LUNCHED. VEGGIE SANDWICH LEFT OVER FOR DINNER. BROWNIE BITES. 2 SMALL PUZZLES IN BAGS. 1 PEN. GOOD DAY.
TOOK BACK 4 DVD MISSION.
Thursday, March 5, 2020
GOT HOME 1
MY ROUTINE ADDED SAFEWAY LOOKING FOR COUPON FREEBIES. SCU AND HOME.
I'M FEELING TIRED. MORE BECAUSE OF MY LOSSES. I LOST MY SISTERS TO GREED. I'VE LOST SO MUCH FAMILY AND FRIENDS.
I'M FEELING TIRED. MORE BECAUSE OF MY LOSSES. I LOST MY SISTERS TO GREED. I'VE LOST SO MUCH FAMILY AND FRIENDS.
Wednesday, March 4, 2020
CHARLES AND AMY
I HAD FAMILY DREAMS. WHEN MOM DIED 20 MONTHS AFTER DAD, COUSIN AMY STAYED A WEEK TO HELP WITH GETTING THE HOUSE READY, FUNERAL DETAILS, EVERYTHING. SHE WAS MOM'S LITTLE SISTER. OLDEST DAUGHTER OF WAIPAHU AUNTIE AND UNCLE. UNCLE WAS ALCOHOLIC. AUNTIE RAISED WONDERFUL PEOPLE. AMY WENT TO MEDICAL SCHOOL BECAME A NURSE, TOOK CARE OF HER YOUNGER SIBLINGS. CHARLES BECAME A MUSIC TEACHER. THEY HAD CATHERINE AND JOHN.
AFTER A BEAUTIFUL FUNERAL AILEEN TRIED DISSING AMY BY THREATENING TO SUE HER FOR 10 GRAND MOM LOANED HER FOR A DOWN PAYMENT ON HER HOUSE. AILEEN AND MITZI NEVER PAID HER BACK. TOOK ME 6 YEARS. MOM TOLD ME AMY DIDN'T OWE HER ANYTHING LIKE MY SISTERS. YET, AILEEN PRESSURED AMY. MOM ALSO TOLD ME THE 100 GRAND SHE LOANED AILEEN AND LARRY FOR THE FORDHAM HOUSE WAS SECURED BY HER NAME ON THE TITLE. HAD IT BEEN A GIFT THE BANK REQUIRED A LETTER TO THAT EFFECT.
AFTER MOM DIED AILEEN INSISTED IT WAS A GIFT. GREEDY LIAR.
AMY WAS MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT.
FEB-GEORGE B-DAY
MAR-DAD,EX B-DAY
APRIL-A'S B-DAY
MAY-MOM'S B-DAY 1, DEATH DAY 13
JUN-ERIC'S B-DAY 3, DEATH DAY 6
AFTER A BEAUTIFUL FUNERAL AILEEN TRIED DISSING AMY BY THREATENING TO SUE HER FOR 10 GRAND MOM LOANED HER FOR A DOWN PAYMENT ON HER HOUSE. AILEEN AND MITZI NEVER PAID HER BACK. TOOK ME 6 YEARS. MOM TOLD ME AMY DIDN'T OWE HER ANYTHING LIKE MY SISTERS. YET, AILEEN PRESSURED AMY. MOM ALSO TOLD ME THE 100 GRAND SHE LOANED AILEEN AND LARRY FOR THE FORDHAM HOUSE WAS SECURED BY HER NAME ON THE TITLE. HAD IT BEEN A GIFT THE BANK REQUIRED A LETTER TO THAT EFFECT.
AFTER MOM DIED AILEEN INSISTED IT WAS A GIFT. GREEDY LIAR.
AMY WAS MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT.
FEB-GEORGE B-DAY
MAR-DAD,EX B-DAY
APRIL-A'S B-DAY
MAY-MOM'S B-DAY 1, DEATH DAY 13
JUN-ERIC'S B-DAY 3, DEATH DAY 6
Tuesday, March 3, 2020
oh, wonderful
I REMEMBERED DEPOSIT AT 3 PM IN THE POOL. 80 DEGREE DAY SENIORS HAD THE FIREPLACE ON. I'M SO RELAXED I DIDN'T KNOW IF I COVERED LIFE CHECK. I HADN'T SO I DID. I KEPT 10.
ADS CAME AND 2 BILLS. HURRAH!
I LIKE BEING RELAXED.
ADS CAME AND 2 BILLS. HURRAH!
I LIKE BEING RELAXED.
Monday, March 2, 2020
TCB
GOING WITH THE FLOW. I'M GETTING BACK ON TRACK. I HAD A GOOD DAY JUST REALIZED ROSE DIDN'T SHOW.
I DID MY ROUTINE. AT LUNCH I REMEMBERED I HAD TO DO BANKING. WENT AND THEN AT LIBRARY I PICKED UP DVD. I WENT TO VOTE PROVISIONALLY AND THEY CHECKED ONLINE AND I MAILED IT. WHEW! SO I TRIED CALLING OTC SUPPORT AND JESSIE IN FLORIDA HELPED ME ORDER 1 GUM 2 BRACES. ACE WAS OUT OF STOCK SO SHE TRIED EQUATE AND IT WENT THROUGH. I OWED 22 CENTS. DUE TO ARRIVE HERE FRIDAY. I CAN GET A LOT FREE APRIL 1; RUBBING ALCOHOL, VITAMINS, PEROXIDE.
I KEEP FORGETTING AND REMEMBERING. I'VE ALWAYS BEEN ATTENTION DEFICIT BUT NOW I NOTICE.
IT OCCUR ED TO ME THE GYM COULD BENEFIT FROM A TEETER INVERSION BOARD. I HAVE TO REMEMBER TO SUGGEST IT.
I DID MY ROUTINE. AT LUNCH I REMEMBERED I HAD TO DO BANKING. WENT AND THEN AT LIBRARY I PICKED UP DVD. I WENT TO VOTE PROVISIONALLY AND THEY CHECKED ONLINE AND I MAILED IT. WHEW! SO I TRIED CALLING OTC SUPPORT AND JESSIE IN FLORIDA HELPED ME ORDER 1 GUM 2 BRACES. ACE WAS OUT OF STOCK SO SHE TRIED EQUATE AND IT WENT THROUGH. I OWED 22 CENTS. DUE TO ARRIVE HERE FRIDAY. I CAN GET A LOT FREE APRIL 1; RUBBING ALCOHOL, VITAMINS, PEROXIDE.
I KEEP FORGETTING AND REMEMBERING. I'VE ALWAYS BEEN ATTENTION DEFICIT BUT NOW I NOTICE.
IT OCCUR ED TO ME THE GYM COULD BENEFIT FROM A TEETER INVERSION BOARD. I HAVE TO REMEMBER TO SUGGEST IT.
Sunday, March 1, 2020
3 MAXED SECRET
CUPERTINO HAS A COPY. I CAN RETURN AND CHECK OUT.
I DID IT. I WENT AND EXERCISED, THEN CUPERTINO, THEN SAFEWAY CLEARANCE ITALIAN SEASON AND 2 SCRUB ENDED UP BEING FREE $2 GAME DOLLARS AT CUSTOMER SERVICE AND 47 GAME PIECES. SO MUCH FUN. I WENT TO ST JUST IN CASE AND NO LUNCH BUT $1 ZIP BAG FOR UV BLOCKERS.
I WALKED OVER TO LIBRARY TO FINISH CHARGING CHROME AND PHONE. HOME AT 4 I CHECKED MONOPOLY TICKETS. I FORGOT TO EAT LUNCH. I HEATED SENIORS CHICKEN AND BROCCOLI. ATE WATCHING REMINGTON STEEL MARATHON.
HEAVENLY.
I DID IT. I WENT AND EXERCISED, THEN CUPERTINO, THEN SAFEWAY CLEARANCE ITALIAN SEASON AND 2 SCRUB ENDED UP BEING FREE $2 GAME DOLLARS AT CUSTOMER SERVICE AND 47 GAME PIECES. SO MUCH FUN. I WENT TO ST JUST IN CASE AND NO LUNCH BUT $1 ZIP BAG FOR UV BLOCKERS.
I WALKED OVER TO LIBRARY TO FINISH CHARGING CHROME AND PHONE. HOME AT 4 I CHECKED MONOPOLY TICKETS. I FORGOT TO EAT LUNCH. I HEATED SENIORS CHICKEN AND BROCCOLI. ATE WATCHING REMINGTON STEEL MARATHON.
HEAVENLY.
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