free yogurt

so dark out.  i loaded freebie but so dark i'll wait.  at some point i want to harvest avocados.  

watched my games and 'dragnet'.  i like the no nonsense reality.  

disturbing dream

 8-9 yr old boy scavenging sticks=firewood and potato peelings to rinse and cook in war zone.  i can pray for peace and send love.  i think that's what elders are supposed to do.  too many have prayed for violence and excitement for too long.  every thought is a prayer of electrical energy a request to the neutral engine of creation.

Bart filled 2 extra bins from next door and let me know 14 hours currently.   his truck totaled Monday hit on Monroe his back rattled.  he's using his sedan to transport tools.  i promised to pay him $70 Monday.  he wanted more i specified i could only afford $70/ month without hardship taking money from somewhere else.   i suggested church prayer focused electrical energy for bigger better truck and health improvement.  

olive oil

i started brushing my teeth with it after two articles online.  i love the way it feels.  i feel more relaxed.  i brush after every meal and snack it feels so good like a massage.  

what a fabulous day!  toke brought me calendars, cards, stickers.  bridget came out as i drove in 11:10 from goodwill parking space #1.  dollar tree i bought 10 Libby sausage, 5 xmas jewel pen, 2 jerky.  GW found my winter gym bag $8, 2 unusual tops 7 each.  i'm wearing one so comfortable stretchy.

i can listen to 2 healing at the same time opening separate pages.  woo hoo!

do nothing 2 #1853

i'm catching up on west side story, crawdads sing, eternal s.  i'm being the best i know.  such bummers.  happiness is hard.  so much is a rehash of unhappiness there's few examples of happiness.

i thought i caused the electric cord short but it was the angle of plug while charging.  phew. 

made spaghetti with cream cheese and sauce.  so delicious to eat what i want.

dress rehearsal

i dressed to fill car 6 am cost co decided tomorrow 7 is better.  i'm cooling down the house.  yesterday was 92 o i stayed playing on the puzzle 'til 3.  today is my day of rest.  fun day before sun day.

so many useless things on samsung chrome.  a dark theme i don't know why or if i like it.  i'll try it.  didn't like it.  

cooked taters eggs avocado burritos, chef boyardi chick tamales.  

       

tired

a lot accomplished this week.  probably tired from the pint of ice cream.  so worth it.  next week meet new doc.  i do have goals.  little manageable ones.

i went to gym late 8 and saw judy from seniors on my way out.  i puzzled after lunch.  the homeless black b had her things all over the puzzle table morning and left puzzle a mess.  

i rested and stretched.

heaven

i paddled the pool thinking how perfect.  if hot the lap pool.  if cold the hot tub or steam room or sauna.  i played for an hour.  gravity was unkind.  seniors i puzzled, bookmobile i felt complete didn't need anything.  lunch ok i puzzled some more 'til 3 movin' and groovin'.  then mission library picked up combo needed charging gamed desktop.  went to college safeway nothing i decided dollar tree.  hamburger patties, tater tots, beef ravioli, vienna sausages, little cans of jellied cranberry, spaghetti sauce, flour tortilla, pint of butter pecan ice cream.  most i ever spent.  

home i'm watching 'designing women' and 'becker'.  

am tire

i spent the entire after lunch puzzling.  then at mission library i checked disc and city online recycle survey.  if i'd checked my e mail i could pick up combo.  tire went smoothly.  home back roads relaxing.

truc, anh, anh

vietnamese father, son, mother autistic boy fast becoming a teen.  i gave him temple g book 'thinking in pictures.'  the resources at back best part.  anh means brother.  truc = bamboo, straight.

seniors very smoky i'm feeling tired.  24 hour is good air.  

amazing

life continues to surprise me.  d e asked me who's in charge of senior center then turns to white man Ron to verify.  he says Jess is in charge.  after going round and round they conclude Jess is in charge of lunch and Jen the center.  now did she do it to engage white penis or have a real question or just intend to insult me?  i'll let it go and wait for clarity.  

bart v was here said 3 hours.  only one half bins.  usually one bin per hour.  

i don't know what i'm feeling

one step at a time.  made it to sunny just b 4 rain.  20 minutes 'til noon open book sale i'm getting excited how silly am i.  i planned on gym but too much fruit to pick up.  

23 movies, actually more some are double and triple.  used the reading coupon zero cost.  2 pm i want to go home.  darryl sc main library retired computer room tech here.  safeway checked clearance nothing.  rained harder came home checked out bethel church fair rained out.  

i took forgotten supplements and feeling great.  bed 6 pm.  

a proper do nothing day

i decided.  my legs and hips hurting.  i put on yoga pants back in bed after spaghetti sandwich for b'fast.  and brushed my teeth.  my ribbed underwear make me so itchy.  enough of that back to healing music relaxing.  ah, i so deserve this.  and the 3 pieces of trudy's bundt sponge cake.  chocolate sour cream frosting.  i'm  going to try with plain yogurt.  

wow, crashed and i don't care.  i just recovered settings.  enjoying watching tv comedies 'godfrey', 'hopscotch', etc.  

looking for 'death at a funeral' sunny has book sale tomorrow.  the remake and the original put the fun in funeral.

i'm trying to get through 175 emails.  3 days now.  

nuked frozen diced chicken 15 min 30% and broccoli 10 @ 20%.

picked up free silk oat milk

6 am loaded freebie.  space #1 gym.  picked up free bought arugula used expiring reward.  worked out took home grocery.  now i'm sitting senior parking so relaxed i could sleep, time to bike and recharge.  talking things over with trudy i realize ive replaced my sisters.  they're fired.  i have toke and trudy.  funny 'cause one married one single.  

no idea what i did but the tabs are on call only so the screen size is bigger

if i knew what i'm doing and how i'd probably be dangerous. 

gym was great.  i paid target and charged shower sandals and crunchy pb.  senior gym and lunch.  bookmobile i gave code 3 bags avocados, 1 oranges apple.  5 new movies.  toke bought me 5 oxi water from west gate bevmo.  she delivered and left b4 i got to door. 

ok crash and reset back to normal.

2864 augusta ct i'm resisting

i know it.  i'm aware.  i'm normal resisting.  i'm abnormal i'm aware i'm resisting.  feels weird.  i couldn't sleep.  that's normal experiencing change too.  

i asked front desk since no senior center gym attendant jennifer told me she decided twice not to change the tv channel so the blood and guts programs are stuck until an attendant changes them.  i'd rather not program my brain's auto pilot with violence that makes me want to chop someone up.  i support her gets her violent bloody gory life.  i guess that's what happens.  i have to bring my library books to read.  i finally tried ellen de book too stupid not clever or funny.

and they stopped setting the back table for lunch.  i moved table settings so i can charge and listen to healing.  it's funny the room was full they had to add settings.

bed 8 pm last night

too tired.  better tonight 8:30 pm.  bart showed up 7 am just as i was leaving for gym.  good day.  toke very tired too.  maybe the air pollution.  diana complaining of allergies.

beautiful day

bart showed up.  when i got home the entire front yard was cleared.  took 4 hours.  2 months budget.

taking my time 911

made 3 chicken arugula croissants b'fast lunch and dinner.  i watched my 'any day now' and then the gym lovely cool.  i got to library 5 minutes b 4 open.  picked up hot spot charged with chrome.  loaded safe way flash sale 2 pm already gone bought wasabi almonds drove to maria no $1.47 peanuts either.  nothing i wanted.  home.  good exercise walking store.  

i am as stupid as i look weird saturday

talked to gardener Bartolo Valadez $35 an hour as i was collecting wind fall fruit.  2 hours month i can afford.  he stopped and engaged me in conversation about cactus then asks to use water for fruit.  i don't know.  said he'd fill one green bin monday.  we'll see.

very weird day.  i drive towards gym Lawrence cops blocked off intersection.  8:30 already i decide to go st just change my mind at ecr proceed to gym.  showers appear full.  white woman irritates me empty shower with towel.  i wait for next available.  i am as stupid as i look.

9:30 st just jumble sale more flea market i bought $1 turtle magnet.  i'm satisfied.  did everything i set out to do.  i made 2 avocado egg, 1 banana croissant for lunch with chips.  st just had $2 do nut coffee didn't sound good.  

home 2:30 when library closed 80 o.  my requests available 21 items checked out. 

staying cool no freebie

lucky's.  checking 1 pm says 7:45 am 20 oz coke dreamworld added but i don't believe it.  i left to watch 'any day' at 9:30.  now i'm at main cooling in redwood room 1 pm.  admission day holiday city closed.  

found free dreamboat coke 20 oz.  went saratoga 5:45 lucky's bought arugula.  forgot free sushi water safeway oh, well such is life.

stayed in cool pool 'til 9:30

too hot.  says  83 o feels way hotter.  i stayed in pool 82 o 'til 9:30.

woo hoo!  got bumped from regular round table sitting in back charging and blogging.  waved alex over gave me green salad then toke.  she chose to sit across from me at picnic not round.  too hot i ate mash sandwich.   lee so funny.  didn't see him 'til after 12 waved and he looks behind him.  he brought over his apple and milk.  

main 1 favorite parking and relaxing upstairs feet up on poof.  i have burritos and lunch.  

survived another year

dad's last week i was literally dying.  no sleep, dragging him around, trying to work independent contractor, suicide watch on mom.

no wonder i feel exhausted.  fighting off my sisters since hasn't left me time to recover.

typical i'm sitting outside waiting for noon open cooling station not open 12:30.  i'm sure to get my preferred sitting spot.  i announced in general if i died of stroke or hear attack in heat to sue on my behalf.  black guard that yelled at me yesterday sucking up to stinky man sans father from senior center.  could smell them from 25 feet away.  wore funny beanies.

senior center crash

lost my post.  gym was great when i left 8 am only one in pools.  $tore 2 chips 1 turmeric 15 caps for inflammation pain.  good for brain.  also hanging out in cold library.  frustrating cooling center they opened library 1 pm rather than just one room but didn't mention.  so i'm looking for entrance no note nothing expecting mind reading.  found parking lot plastic crystal drop.  didn't want to park illegally.  

i stayed seniors 12:30 to stay cool Hilda gave me 4 extra fish and 1 complete meal.  so i have them over air condition vent.  my body is reacting like dad's final days.  

4 pm 108 o.  sitting library cafe tables.  ate 3 fish and broccoli.  breading counts as carbs.  people still coming into library.  6:30 people still coming.  tomorrow open noon to 7.  i'm using wet suit for cooling.  6:30 car says still 99 o online weather forecast says 104 o.  after all day guard commented on elevated legs.  time to move.

forgot to open

4 pm main cooling.  96 o and i'm ok except i woke with black floater in my eye that has me concerned.  directly in center right eye where sv eye dr found problem spot 2 yrs ago computer touched my eye.

moon day 9/5 dad's 23rd death day.  i believe i combined eric with dad.  if either one of them ever learned to do right i'd feel better.  a good death is earned.  dying is as important as living.

just occurred to me i wouldn't have bought a chrome myself.  having my own is convenient.  

102 o.  back to gym 5 pm.  

i think i'm ok despite dad's ptsd

i'll find out tonight.  i'm home relaxing after returning combo to mission library.  talked to bee.  gave her senior oranges.  book mobile cancelled by seniors center yesterday just weird.  nothing happened yesterday.  code is sick.  needed the rest.

i picked up freebie draft latte then spa my feet excruciating.  nerves back alive.  i'm focusing on my feet my foundation to health.  

even though the dell weighs more i actually prefer the flat keyboard.  and i prefer the shiny screen to non glare plastic. 

sat 9/3 watching 'any day' the suppressed feelings dredged up.  

yes!

gym is the best.  massaged my feet using spa jets 20 minutes so relaxing.  $tore then waited 20 minutes for chase to open 10 minutes to locate ira papers.  couldn't remember i'd put them in small purple binder organizer.  went through entire car.  inside atm rebooting after servicing.  straight to credit union deposit.  seniors no bookmobile no code.  gave everything to toke.  i was planning returning library mission tomorrow to use hot spot for fry freebie.  i can use bank free wifi next week seniors closed.