I love my boss

ME!!  I picked up Lucky's free dark peanut chew, 7 clearance 99 cent cheeses and egg avocado.  entered my contests, played on the puzzle.  good to get back to lunch with Fred and Toki.  Walter showed up 11:45 cut off time.  I suggested he try different behavior to flirt and shared how in high school Lance G patted me on the head that just irritated me.  just made me think he was stupid.  hey, I was 16.

Walter is growing into himself.  and I'm feeling connected to the world.

home at 2:20 for my people Puzzler my parking spot blocked.  then I remembered I wanted $5 Friday fruit tart.  I went to Maria Safeway no tarts.  I walked the store for something, anything but nothing.  so I forwent the 4 pm game show and drove to 150 Safeway and bought tart, clearance olive parmesan loaf and pumpkin pie.   Then I drove to Sprouts.  didn't find anything and ate lots of samples.  WOW ME.  so dinner was the entire 6 inch fruit tart I tried to eat half and failed and 2 slices of meatloaf.  

Brilliant!!

Bingo exercise Hong yesterday suggested Thurs. 10-11.  oh, bliss Mallory said 10:30-11:30 next week.  Cody bookmobile I helped clear his bin.  I got toys he didn't want and continued recycling.  I returned Inge's bottles $4.  

what a great day.  half way through class I picked up my lunch and said hi to Toki so forlorn no Fred, Walter and Salome late.  

I came home and organized.  very productive.  

OMG Millers tv

I 'm amazed I never noticed how critical and negative the characters are.  I find them funny because I'm not related to them.   

new puzzle-Rampart street parade

 and today being Tuesday I'll line up for taxes and pick up movies.  

today felt like childhood with cool overcast

auntie Nancy always expected rain because Hawaii weather.  

Inge has recycle to redeem.

seniors tub

2 pm at central library.  I went 12:30 for taxes and was told people line up half hour before start and to try 3:30 Tuesday.  so I puzzled put together end of trail Indian.  and I found a nickel in downstairs copy room.  and 4 movies.  I returned 3 and Good Half is somewhere 7 days overdue.  I found it 3 in chrome case in trunk

I borrowed 4 watched White Bird Helen Mirren at home sobbing.  I didn't know I was mourning.  I have so much sadness stored in my body.  I'm processing, feeling and breathing it out.

George Hirai born 1940 died 12/21/08 throat cancer.  Brian called to inform, invite and drove me from his house valley fair to LA.  memorial service 3 pm 1/10/09, Fukui Mortuary, "Chapel in the Garden" 707 E Temple St.  

I'm having more fun-ADULT

 Fred has seen Pinky and the Brain.  I can be fun fun silly willy.  

SENIORS

Bookmobile Day I'm stressing Cody won't renew my Chromebook.   

I'm feeling sad for all the people.  

OMG  10:51 just remembered to enter contests.

(noel) Shane

newest member Senior Universe.  we are super heroes.  it's interesting to me how unconscious people can be so consumed by their stories.  

BEST HOLIDAY EVER!!

I WAS A HUMAN BEING!  I put out Monday garbage bin.  and Bartolo took care of green bins.  

yesterday started game show channel 65.7 and I watched all day until 10 pm.  so many shows.  

42 degrees

next door cut more tree filled 4 bins.

11:30 wow, I was hungry.  main library book sale.  

seniors was relaxing.  I soaked an hour.  Jin is w/o a car, hit a speeder.  

I used a bingo coupon bought roast beef sandwich lunch w/tiny potato salad.  Monday is president day.  I stopped at St Just for lunch and a weekend bag.  I'm taking better care of myself.  

today's library mom made a mirror to confirm she's alive.  poor little kid.  it's always a boy.  Sunnyvale moms are better.  they don't keep the kids in the adult section.  they let kids be kids in the kid section.  

1972

I'd been married a few months, woke from dream crying I was in heaven w/o ex.  that's when the ex altar boy told me he didn't believe in heaven and like Ail had been conditioned to believe they were the devil.  

Now I'm creating my heaven and he's not here.  

Bartolo filled both green bins.  cleared everything from yard.  amazing.

happy 45th I hope-big wind storm broke avocado branch

Aaron.  funny how things pop into one's head.  I looked him up he's married in LA a cinematographer.  I pray for my niece and nephews a lot knowing the abuse we experienced.  makes me sad.

Paul...Lloyd's friend stopped by puzzle table left his bottle water.  I was talking to Walter and didn't notice he took my lunch bag until I went to return his water and saw my bag on the computer room table.  Mallory overheard and got upset.  makes me sad.

1:45 I got home to find the tree limb half in neighbor's drive.  I left voice mail with Bartolo to come by and check it out.  oh, what to do makes me sad.  he called back 5:45.  too dark.

I'll be OK as long as I can watch my games.  

Hula helped my autism

the dance helped my balance and coordination and the music helped my brain functioning.  the difference in high functioning I'm sure.  

no connection

so no pressure.  

I finished 300 PC. puzzle I started yesterday.  

I'm sitting thinking about the 2 year old AARP magazine article I started reading on music therapy, dementia.  it helped with my autism.  as a child in Hawaii I learned the hula dance and music.  so on 2 levels I helped my autism.  

talking to Linda my leg swelling and back pain is from shaken baby.  Walter tried to indoctrinate like I'm stupid and I wasn't having it and I told him.  like I haven't lived in this body 74 years.  I'm not renting, I own this body.  Walter took off when I wouldn't play.  Fred and Toki, stinky fish so they had salads.  thank you Walter for the opportunity to champion myself.

I puzzled and then went to college Safeway for chips and found  clearance lemon curd and 2 balsamic and carnitas dinner and chicken egg rolls.  and I have 3 cooked drumsticks.  I don't know what I did the chrome is acting very weird.  

6:57 seniors

Trudy and Kenny this week at lunch.  it's nice having company waiting for Fred and Toki.  food not good company excellent.  Trudy brought Stan's donuts for Toki.  Fred Toki and I prefer old fashions.  I took mine home, Fred ate his, Kenny ate his then denied his mucous was from sugar.  he only weighs 450.  

I want to move more.  I watched Beetlejuice 2 and it has my karaoke favorites.  so many movies are using songs I preferred.  I must have timeless taste.  home 2:30 for game shows.  I considered coming back for the pool and to finish the puzzle I started, nah.

looking forward-Toki 80 surprise party-Super Bowl Sunday

I'm excited.  so much of my life has been doing what's needed or putting out fires not what I'd choose.  I had no choice.  I was conditioned, trained to follow orders, punished at every turn.  

I printed 3 maps to get there.  smooth.  got there before 11 after 24 hour shower.  left 1:30 after Mirek and Anna.  sat with Trudy and Kenny.  met Nona, Cathy, Linda.  maybe 70 people.  nieces very sweet.  good food Ocean Delight and large piece of cake.  3 bottles of water so far.  

she was decidedly surprised.  she gave me the grumpy look for not warning her.  the food was very good.  I considered getting to go, nah.  

2:30 at Sunny library.  I considered shopping at Savers or anywhere and drove old stomping grounds.  no interesting puzzles here.  

nothing at Sprouts ate shepherds' purse.  home 5 pm bed 8:30.  nothing but reruns.

woke 6 seniors 7:55- Friday 1/3 fall

life can be beautiful.  I'm  having fun.  I can do or not do.  this highly stylized rooster barnyard puzzle is close to completion and the first that doesn't have to be perfect only close.   can't differentiate the color pattern.  

and now to soak.  lovely being and doing in a safe space in my own time.  I massaged my right knee and shin still so freshly sore.  over a month since falling.

I picked up both lunch and pantry today.  Sandy "not Nancy" at St Just.  it pays to be polite.  groceries lots of fruit veg, 2 huge cabbages, frozen chick quarters.  I like the soft fresh bread ham'n cheese sandwiches.  dad made his own sandwiches but not mine.  not mom.  she ate lunch out.  

I did a car trunk clear out.  I'm feeling stronger.  emotional resilience 

I'm watching red carpet for 3/2 Oscars.  I'm distracting myself.  I'm conflicted in how to celebrate Toki.  She's my real sister.  

seniors

it's consistent.  my hair is sooo silky.  

I picked up my free 4 mini pack Jones root beer.  20 cents deposit.  I used Lucky's connection.  I bought 2 low salt Fritos, 2 free using my $7.89 gift card.  I'm getting what I want.  

no SUNNY hot spot DIVINE ORDER

AND SO IT IS.  I turned in Sunny Spot and movies.  they keep track of late now 4 days late.  

today the weather is sunny

I'm releasing my stress and anxiety.  maybe I'll go to Cup.  eh.  Walter showed up talked with Salome.  I kept on track and went to pick up holds.  I planned on returning a hot spot to Sunny and it says no internet.  so it doesn't matter.  

too much good espresso

I'm starting to feel jittery.  I'm having delicious espresso with coconut milk in the mornings and i forget to have tea at lunch.  Hilde's getting sneaky taking out separate dishes then second cart much later with complete meals.  I got chicken.  

6 am it was raining hard.  6:30 it paused, I drove to seniors.  then drizzled all day.  I decided I deserve easy.  home for my game shows.

yay! hurray! I paid Bartolo/Adela

I arrived seniors peacefully.  soaked an hour and had the alternate r b sandwich for lunch.  the veg pasta looked very overcooked.  Fred and Toki had lots of room today.  Toki said no b'day acknowledgment.  OK.

I considered banking, Cup, Sunny, central.  always tomorrow.  

Bartolo and Adela (I gave her the $70) came after 3 pm to do the yard.  

lovely quiet day.

breakfast soup

I put salad in a bowl topped with chicken meatball Progresso soup heat for 4 minutes.  I halved a bagel topped with balance toasted so good I toasted the second half.   

and watching Tempation.  today I married a Witch and The Ghost and Mrs Muir.  two movies I can always enjoy watching.  and I can go to the central library to finish the puzzle.  and I can always watch movies on the library computers.  

showered at 24 after gas fill up 11:30 took 11 minutes.  just before I got to Costco a bunch of cars appeared.  

3:20 finished puzzle.  I'm feeling hungry I forgot to eat lunch.  I parked under library.  oh I forgot to read Friday's paper from college Safeway.  

I feel good.  my new visualization I see myself healthy, strong, incredible.  

on my way to seniors

7:41 first in the empty parking lot I wondered if it was the right day.  I checked the online February newsletter.  7:50 people drove in and waited outside the doors.  overcast supposed to rain.  I had protein shake.  yesterday I completely forgot b'fast wasn't hungry.

tub soaked my hour in blessed silence.  Dave was quiet.  I remembered banking withdrew Chase proceeded to St Just picked up lunch.  indoor picnic.  I thought about county library for next week.  

I'm so glad I never had kids to ignore and neglect.  so many are abandoned by parents having the library babysit.  me too, I was dropped off at the library.  people who should never be around children.  never have kids.  that's what's wrong with the world.  ALL THE PROBLEMS OF THE WORLD ARE NEGLECTED,ABANDONED, IGNORED and ABUSED CHILDREN.  THERE ARE NO RIGHT PEOPLE HAVING KIDS.  

my problem with locks are from Ail stealing my key and lying I lost my key.  and if I told mom might kill her and it would be my fault.  I keep remembering mom beating Ail with a broomstick and Mit and I hiding under the kitchen table listening to screams.  Mit has no memory of it but I'm sure it caused her being sick a lot, sore throats, ear infections and stomach problems.